New Year's partyand more
by Kusanagi-Kiba
Summary: The group survives miraculously before the Boshin War-and are currently celebrating-Someone gives in confessing to Chizuru, and the Shinsengumi, including Yamazaki continue their bickering yet less glorious daily lives-
1. Chapter 1

This timeline is some where in season 2 , near the middle..basically where they start/are to die off-except they survive.

Kondou than decided that New Year's meant his boys deserved a round of sake. Everyone was in high spirits, even the rough-looking Hijikata.

It had been quite awhile since the last time they all drank together-it really wasn't much about the sake though, as much as it was relaxing and enjoying each other's company.

It was also going to be Chizuru's second time coming along. She was happy to see everyone to cheerful. She was also slightly worried about being harassed again, not like she hated kimonos or anything. The girl shrugged it off and remembered it wasn't really that bad-she was just embarrased.

The guys were horsing around, Sanosuke and Shinpachi harrasing Heisuke about his young drinking habits, Okita was putting his sly act on; persuasion to get more sake off Kondou, as if he'd behave far better with it. Saito was quiet like usual, smiling quietly to himself. He and Hijikata often stood silently taking in their environmental atmosphere, even if their actions showed little. They often simply liked to savor what they had for how long it lasted-because they knew battles awaited at any given time, tomorrow could be their last.

"Okay guys, well since sake is on me tonight, I hope you will at least cooperate with our doctor today-like for example, last time he wanted us to clean up...I don't think Chizuru can do that all by herself."

Sanosuke frowned, shrugging his arms "Awe, we were a burden for Chizuru? No way, come on guys!" he shouted, grabbing a broom, and ended in falling over the handle, face first.

Kondou tried not to laugh aloud"I see someone hasn't been picking up his chores...come on Sanosuke! The broom is like a spear—only the other end is made for cleaning messes instead of making them" he smirked.

"Yeah, like the red stains your spear leaves behind!" Shinpachi joined himself in.

"Hey! Your sword leaves bigger messes, at least I only stab the guy" Sanosuke retorted in defense.

"Yeah, well...at least my guys stay dead" Okita added.

"Yes, and what a bloody mess, too, eh?"

Shinpachi grinned. He knew Okita was a bit dark on the inside. The joke wouldn't be too offensive.

"Yeah...sometimes" admitted Okita, scratching his head.

As the men helped their female member tidy the headquarters, the day seemed to pass them by quicker than they thought. It was still fairly light outside, but everyone grew rather hungry and decided cleaning was actually a lot of work—work they weren't really excited about.

"Oh man, I just want to eat...and than, later we can go out. Maybe if we work our butts off it will go by faster" groaned Heisuke.

"Oh, you are just a growing boy, you'll stop feeling so hungry when your strong like us" Shinpachi teasted.

"Yeah, some days...I don't even feel it!" Sanosuke exclaimed rather enthusiastically, with a hit of obliviousness.

"Dude, you don't even feel your stomach? How?" Heisuke leaned over, curious of this possibility.

"Well, for one, samurai should be able to go without food when necessary-you'll understand one day, short one"

"I do believe in such ideals, however I do prefer to eat" Saito seemed to appear out of nowhere like usual.

"Eating is no problem for shinobi-even if were short, we compromise with what we find" Yamazaki also managed to appear out of nowhere.

"Yeah, well, if I was that hungry, I'd compromise too...even plants look tasty sometimes"

"Actually..."He eyed Saito for amused confirmation if he should even bother sharing"when it goes rough, sometimes I eat the bugs. Beetles aren't too bad, they do seem rather bitter though-"

"What? Okay, That's disgusting!...no way I'm eating no damn bug...you ninjas can keep your ways, I'll stick with rice" Heisuke appeared utterly disgusted, tongue sticking out.

"As would I..."

The men walked together in a small group towards the room they frequented for supper. They held a short practice session with their units, and let them go early. If the captains were going to be out celebrating, it was only fair to let the other men enjoy their evening as well.

It was near 10pm when everyone started towards their favourite outing destination. In all reality, not a lot of merriment had been taking place until now-they had lost many men, moved from several other headquarters, and with the pressure to impress their lord for support, their number of victories were actually declining from rash orders being given.


	2. Chapter 2

It was dark outside. The air was quite pleasant, neither cool nor too warm. There were red lanterns lit along the paths leading towards the main roads. As they neared the nicely-lit buildings with red, curved roofs, there were more lanterns alit in every direction.

"Woo, I can't wait!" Heisuke jumped.

"Your always so enthusiastic when it comes to sake" Okita stated, as if he was not.

"It's always like that when your smaller-makes them feel bigger" Sanosuke sneered.

"Hey, I might be younger, but I sure am capable of being a man"

"According to you, anyway—haven't you picked up any woman yet? Mr. Heisuke-man?" Shinpachi grinned.

"I-I haven't...I mean, I can! It's not like I cannot...I just don't have time!" Heisuke said defensively.

"Yeah...I guess..." Shinpachi pondered in a rather sarcastic manner.

"phew..." Heisuke sighed, rather naïve.

"Although that's not excuse-you can still look at them"Sanosuke added.

Okita was walking with them, not saying much. He seemed to have some opinion on woman, but decided to just keep it to himself-he was rather mischievous in his younger days.

Awhile Chizuru always found it funny to watch the boys bicker, suddenly felt slightly uncomfortable. She didn't mind about them mentioning girls once in awhile...I mean, they're men right? She's surrounded by them, but she just didn't like being open to becoming the subject of interest—or about hearing how they think when she's not around.

Saito noticed her nervousness "Don't mind them" he reassured her. Yamazaki and Hijikata were trailing behind, talking about something she lost mind of-clearly some men were so involved in their work that they forgot why they were walking together. She smiled to herself and kept walking. Sannan was near the front talking to Kondou about something she didn't quite grasp, and she zoned them out.

She took in the welcoming atmosphere in, smelling the smells of food, the sounds of laughter and activity, and the sights of human interaction. As she drew herself into her surroundings, the gentle wind caressing the trees soothed her. It truly was a beautiful night.

Chizuru's awareness interaction seemed to be of notice however, as she saw Hijikata sneaking a look at her now-cluelessly red face. She turned her head quickly and looked the other way.. Hijikata felt embarrased as he realized he had disturbed the girl. Yamazaki chuckled, but said nothing.

Moments later, the troupe arrived at their destination.

Kondou stepped forward, greeting the men at the front.

"Good Evening, Kondou-san" one man bowed.

"I'll have a room for all of us"

"Can do..just wait a moment please" he smiled, bowed and walked to the counter.

As the other guys and Chizuru stood behind Kondou, their female kimono-clad server came to greet them.

"I'm Hina-san and I'll be at your service for tonight. Any special requests?"

"Nah, maybe some dumplings and such on the side is good-no specific music, something fun"

"Than can be done. Come this way, and I'll be with you shortly"

Hina lead them to their room and walked out.

The boys sat down, laughing and smiling over conversation.

As their server arrived with their entertainment and food (and sake, of course), they started to mow down instinctively.

Saito was his reserved self as usual, eating his dumplings with ease. Hijikata did the same.

By the time half the sake was passed around, Heisuke managed to get himself drunk. He had a bad habit of drinking too fast, especially when he was hungry. Supper was only light, and was only meant to last till now, after all...why shouldn't he be hungry? Or was his excuse, anyway.

Sannan, Shinpachi, Sanosuke, Heisuke and Okita were the ones who often drunk the most besides Heisuke. They were bickering over silly things, but still having their fun. They often liked to pick on Heisuke more than usual, who was feisty and tried to fight back. Sannan did not join as much in the bickering, but he did seem to secretly enjoy picking on the smallest boy.

"Haha!" Sanosuke looked at Hijikata-who clearly couldn't handle his alcohol still. Saito was okay, if anything he was good at hiding his. He merged quietly with the corner of the room so to speak, Yamazaki often did the same, but he felt like joining in conversation with Kondou, who was laughing.

Chizuru didn't mind being drowned out. It was wonderful to see everyone smiling. Just when it couldn't be worse, she noticed like usual, one of the woman serving tea or sake would be hitting on Hijikata. She fumed with envy inside, than her little fume puffed of smoke in defeat like usual. It was not like the other boys weren't attractive-but they were so involved already, and Hijikata just happened to be their superior rank, so woman often gawked more at him anyway-and he was rather handsome...wait? What was she thinking?

She tried to focus on the Shamisen playing-the music distracted her enough until she thought she caught herself glancing at Hijikata.

"Ah!" she signed in defeat in her own mind. She looked utterly defeated. Saito noticed, glancing, as he spoke rather calmly "Don't worry about it, it's their job to charm the customers-I'm sure he notices".

"W-what?" Chizuru was so put off by that statement that she didn't know what to say. Saito was often overlooked despite his handsome appearance, but it was in his favor at most. He was so quiet that she didn't expect him to say something like that.

While some boys got attention, Yamazaki didn't do too well with girls—he was so used to being avoidant that talking to a woman was an entirely different thing, than convincing someone to give up their intelligence. He wasn't too bad with Chizuru, but he felt more of a brotherly bond with her-he missed a sister he hadn't seen in quite a long time.


	3. Chapter 3

Just as the boys were becoming lost in their own world, Hijikata managed to look rather red in face. He officially had enough sake for his own good. He was not the type to act rashly or foolishly even when drunk-most times he just looked goofy, as if he didn't know how to take what was being fed into his body.

However, thinks surely again could not be any worse for poor Chizuru, as amidst all the laughing and commotion, someone across the room-possibly Sanosuke, or anyone really...seemed to have ordered one of the servers to dress up their female shinsengumi member.

The woman was pleased and giggled. She must enjoy playing with makeup and clothing, Chizuru thought, frowning.

"Chizuru, if they do anything stupid, they'll get punished" Hijikata spoke out what was supposed to be reassuring. It was, except she hoped they would not do anything he considered stupid.

Chizuru sighed in defeat once more, and walked away, sulking. Whatever it was about her reaction, Kondou thought she was adorable-like a daughter realizing she can't win every fight.

The boys had rather short-term memory at times like these and already forgot the ordeal they put Chizuru in, until she walked back inside 20 minutes later.

Wrapped in a purple and silver kimono was Chizuru. The silk played very nicely on her form, and made her feminine appearance cause the boys to be speechless and blush-faced.

"I think this lady did an even better job than the last one!"

"You speak as if you put her through this ordeal often" Hina sounded humoured yet unimpressed."Poor girl".

Saito didn't want to show that he was blushing as well, and Yamazaki-kun tried to hid it best he could-little did he remember, he actually had not seen her all dressed up before-he was absent from this apparently-happening dilemma of hers.

"She's cute..." he muttered out quietly, turning his gaze away.

Hijikata looked up curiously to see she had returned, and felt an awkward shock hit him. He always knew she was female like the other men did, but whenever he saw her dressed like this he felt pressured to keep his thoughts stable. The first time he was quite coolheaded-after all, he was already relaxing outside away from the warmth of the other people around-it was just so awkward, and there she was.

"Hey, Chizuru looks esspecially cute this evening!" Okita said in a rather drunk word stumble.

"Highly agree" Shinpachi teased.

"If I knew better, She could be a pretty mistress-married to some rich lord!" Sanosuke added, clearly half-thought out.

Just before Heisuke could say something stupid, Hijikata glared in their direction.

Chizuru was far too embarrased to be seen like this, it didn't get much easier. She wasn't even used to dressing as a girl, let alone in something so fine. The hairpieces and makeup were so unlike her, she felt as if she was looking at a different woman when she saw herself in a hand mirror just a few minutes ago. She could get over the kimono if it were less fancy, she admitted she felt flattered by comments...but the rest of this costume was just not her.

Chizuru got up to relax outside, like the time she found Hijikata sitting alone by the deck.

"Aw...she left!"

Yamazaki gave Hijikata a look that said "go see her".

Hijikata got up.

"Hey, where ya goin vice commander?" Shinpachi spouted.

"Somewhere you're not" he glared.

Clearly Hijikata couldn't hold his composure regarding the girl.

As Chizuru used the outside atmosphere to calm herself down, she heard the sliding door open and close. Hoping it was who she though, she decided to expect no one, and turned around casually. She lost her own composure and realized it was Hijikata. He stood before her, looking rather serious.

"S-something up?"

"No...I just wanted to see you, is all"

"you wha-"

Just before she could say anything, she felt an unfamiliar hand touch her face. By unfamiliar, it's not like he did this before-only once, when he touched her chin...but that was different!

"I'm sorry if this is a bad time-maybe I shouldn't have drunk any-but...you look beautiful" His gaze had a bit of eye water from his alcohol intolerance, but he stared into her eyes.

"Um...n-no...it's okay...uh, I..." Chizuru blushed bright shades of red.

Hijikata chuckled, his own cheeks flushed-more than they'd been.

"Ever since Kondou was almost killed, and many of my men have nearly lost their lives-so much has happened...and you've always been there. You could be somwhere else by now...but you aren't." He held his eyes on her, fixed. He wanted her to understand he was serious, regardless of his current condition.

"...Hijikata..san..."

Chizuru stood speechless and weak before him. She didn't know what to say to make this better, what to do to understand what was going on. She could feel a warm feeling radiating off him, drawing her towards him emotionally. His hand was still on her cheek.

"U-um...well, I don't really know how to say it, I think I've fallen in love with you, and somehow being slightly drunk makes me want to say this right now while I still can-I'm sorry"

"..."Chizuru was silenced. Her eyes watered with relief of something she forgot what. Feelings welled up inside her, wanting to hell him how she really felt.

"Thank goodness..." was all she could muster. "I said I'd stay by your side...but now I know I want to, Hijikata...please don't take any of what you said back...it is from your heart, right?" she felt sure he was real, but his substance of sake made her doubt.

"I mean it..." he said, as walked up to her slowly. Even if this state of mind, he was sensible enough to respect her space. As he closed in on the gap between them, he let her react. She did nothing but stare in his eyes, captivated by her situation. She felt lost in his stare, as if no matter what caused him to admit his feelings, he was still sober deep down inside, and smiling through this leeway.

Before she could stare one second longer, she felt the hand on her face adjust itself as his left hand closed in on her other warm cheek. He cupped her face in his hands, staring at her affectionately. Chizuru was lost for what to say "Hijikata san...I think I-no, I Know I love you too..." just as she finished, she felt his breathe close in on her, his gaze turning into a kiss, as their lips touched. He pressed his lips on her gently, adjusting his right hand around her. His left hand stayed strong, holding her chin as if it were too frail to stand alone.

While sudden as it seemed, she knew he wouldn't hurt her. Perhaps others would assume otherwise, but she just knew. After being around him for so long alone, he had any given chance to do something-but he merely kept his hands off her, and stared when she least expected him. He respected woman, especially the one he loved.


	4. Chapter 4

As they parted for air quietly, Hijikata noticed anyone could walk out and see them. He decided to gently usher her to the corner, where they could at least stand together in privacy.

"the moon looks so beautiful..."

Hijikata gazed at her as she looked out. "We can go closer to it, if you want."

What? How?"

He smiled. It seemed to spell of genuine affection as much as mischief.

"Come with me" he grinned.

"Uh-"

He wouldn't take no for an answer, held her arm and lead her around the corner of the balcony. She would have protested, but she decided to just go with whatever he was planning for now. Somehow Hijikata managed to find a good foothold on convenient objects to help her onto the roof.

"Ah! I haven't really been so high up before-"

Don't worry, I'll make sure you are safe. I wouldn't do anything to put you in danger"

She felt genuinely reassured by his tone of voice more than his words. He seemed so lost in his feelings for her that there was no way he would mean anything other than.

As Chizuru settled, she sat down beside Hijikata, who was already relaxing, as if to show her it was alright before she would do it herself.

Chizuru relaxed, and glanced over at him, her head stationary. Just when she noticed he had zoned out briefly looking at the sky, she leaned in on his shoulder.

He was warm, his heartbeat calm.

Something about her touch entranced him. His sake seemed to be wearing off, leaving him with a relaxed, sober mind. He would have felt something similar regardless, but seeing her dressed so beautifully mad him want to admire her more. He wanted to wrap his arms around her frail figure enhanced by the folds of her silk fabric. Just as he felt the urge to put his arm on her, he noticed her neck. She was leaning hard on him, so the collar on the opposite side exposed her nape. He thought he wanted to touch her neck?

"_No.." _He told himself. He was still under influence perhaps...yes, that was it. He would forget about that.

Before Chizuru could ask what was wrong, he sneaked his left around around her. Her delicate frame made him long for her, he never wanted to let go.

Chizuru squeeked quietly in surprise, Hijikata chuckled, putting his chin on her head.

Chizuru had never been in this situation before-all she knew is she didn't want it to end. Hijikata felt as if something deep inside him have been saved. He knew he would have to part with his men one day-being how many of them there were, his friends were eventually going to die around him. Most of them survived on sheer luck, sometimes last minute turn arounds, and hard bargaining. He was afraid he was losing himself in the darkness-but beside him all along was something to keep him from faltering.

They had never felt so in love, he had never needed her more, and she felt genuinely safe for the first time in her life.

Before any words could be spoken, Chizuru turned and looked at him. He seemed to know what she wanted, as he smiled and held her head, before embracing her lips with his own. This had become a ritual they would follow whenever they were alone-for his arms wrenched without her in them, and his body felt colder without her beside it.

"Hijikata, I totally forgot I was on a roof all of a sudden-but it's such a nice view"

I know it is...and, even though I'm aware of my surroundings...I felt like I wanted to be oblivious, and not care where I was-as long as you are still with me".

That was honestly the most sweet thing she had heard from anyone. She kissed him, and he managed to fall backwards, forcing her to land on him. They both blushed together, staring into each other's eyes.

"Chizuru..." He held her back and pulled her body towards his. She lay flat against his chest, not bothering to move. Chizuru smiled, eyes gleaming of small happy tears. She tucked her head under his, and moved closer to him, for what was still possible.

They lost track of time, and after an hour or so, both managed to drift off to sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

"Hey...Hijikata-san and Chizuru have been gone an awfully long time" Shinpachi brought out.

"Yeah...you are right, arent you?"

"Whatever, they can be that way...let us just drink, okay?" Heisuke was quite drunk already, had he stood up he probably would have fell over.

The other boys were more experienced at standing up after too much sake-they could hold their ground, but they did manage to wobble.

"Another, please!" Okita raised his hand. The Hina was about to pour for him, "No, no...not for me...for my friend there...heis...Hei-su-ke. He thinks hes a man, so, let us see...how much he can drink!"

She smiled and sighed in sympathy for these drunk boys. They weren't entirely so bad, and seemed to bring lots of money in, anyway.

"So, Kondou was paying right? Give him another one too!"

"Hey hey! Don't be tellin' her how much I get, I'll be in control of my own intake of, stuff...you are just trying to make the bill bigger, arent you!"

"Yeaaaaah...I mean, no!" Okita exclaimed with nothing more than mischief.

Saito tried to stay out of their endeavors and sat quietly in his corner, occasionally taking up conversation with Yamazaki. They were both tired and had enough sake to keep them silent as statues.

"But, I agree they have been gone for long..." Kondou pondered.

"Maybe..."Okita's mischievous voice started

"Ah, No!" Kondou shook his hands, closing his eyes. "Don't even assume that! Hijikata's a good man, he wouldn't-"

"Yeah, well, maybe it's different when he's had sake and is completely alone with a girl we all know he's been supressing his feelings for, way too long?" Sanosuke grinned. "Hijikata might be a bad boy!"

Saito blushed regarding the assumption that Chizuru and Hijijata were making romance. It would have been less awkward if they weren't absent from a party.

"Let's not assume things. Maybe they just needed some time to talk"

By the time everyone was ready to go home, it was past 2am. The boys when outside, looking around the balcony. They started to think maybe the two actually ran off somewhere-until Saito and Yamazaki seemed to feel a soft, lingering presence above.

Yamazaki got himself on the roof, only to confirm his feeling. There was hijikata and Chizuru, fast asleep. Chizuru had dug her face into Hijikata's haori, him his his arm around her. They appeared serene and genuinely innocent. Yamazaki smiled, relieved. There was always a part of his commander he wanted to see fall through before they perished-and now he felt like his rush to save Hijikata's life was made easier—Hijikata was at no rush to die to war any longer-he would make more logical or emotional decisions not purely based on obeying orders. Either way, he just wanted to see his leader find a path to lead him away from disaster.

"You, did you find anything?" Sannan asked.

"Yeah..."Yamazaki replied calmly.

"They are on the roof?" Kondou laughed. "That's odd. Well, I guess not..."

"Huh...so..."

"They are sound asleep. Go on without me, I'll wake them myself and return with them"

"Okay, whatever you say man" Sanosuke waved. "Let's go home guys". Most of them had problems walking straight, but managed to get back home without causing any issues or starting fights.

"Vice-Commander..." Yamazaki made his presence heavy. Hijikata began to wake, opening his eyes slightly.

"Were all going now. I suggest you two come as well, you'll catch a cold out here" he said quietly,with a kind tone. He didn't want to wake Chizuru.

"Very well. I lost track of time...'his words trailed off as he remembered Chizuru laying on him. He remembered his arm around her. Taking it all back in, he remembered what led to his current situation.

"I'll just wake her"

"No problem...I'll wait for you infront of the building".

Hijikata felt a bit awstruck that he made himself so obvious. Even despite, his shinobi friend seemed to act like he'd seen it before.

"He probably knew...before I ever did. I can't fool him, he knows me better than I do" he smiled, thankful for such a insightful comrade.

As soon as Yamazaki disappeared, Chizuru began to stir. Hijikata wondered if maybe he weakened his presence around her, so as to avoid interrupting her.

"...Hijikata..-san.."

He smiled down at her sweetly.

"I-I forgot..."

"It's not like we meant to sit on a roof, don't worry about it-it's real, I assure you" Hijikata squeezed her gently.

"It's getting cold outside...maybe we should go back"

"Yeah, were going to go back now..." Hijikata said gently. He stroked her hair.

Before they could go though, Chizuru had to remember she was laying on him.

"Oh, sorry...I guess I should get up" She laughed meekly.

"It's okay, I really don't mind" he smiled playfully.

"I love you" said Chizuru, turning to face him.

"I love you too" He kissed her affectionately.

Chizuru got up after a few moments of procrastinating. She sat up, waiting for Hijikata to stand. They walked to the edge where he had helped her climb, and carefully helped her descent. He went down first so he could catch her if she slipped.

"Okay, I'm coming...maybe if I wasn't so short I'd be good at this" she worried.

"It's okay, I have you" he said as she launched herself down. She managed to get down fine, but Hijikata seemed to want to catch her anyway.

"I-I'm fine"

"I just wanted to do that anyway" he smirked, holding her close. He put her down soon after, than he realized she was still wearing the garments the girls put on her."Hey...they still probably have your clothes inside. We should see if they want the kimono-although, I think it looks great you, I want you to keep it " he smiled.

"Don't even think of stealing it, Hijikata" Chizuru warned him.

"Oh, I won't...but I might have to if it looks so nice" he teased.

Chizuru wasn't used to being in a relationship, so she didn't always know how to react. She blushed. "Let's go see, than", as she walked towards the doors.

"Here are your clothes, mam. Um...actually, you can keep it if you want. It is a nice kimono, but we got tons...and it looks so good on you" Hina smiled kindly. "Plus, these men sure gave us a lot-they must've made their master broke!"

Chizuru didn't doubt it.

"That tip they left alone would have paid a portion of this...take it as a gift, if you will. Be sure to come back, though!" she giggled. It was fun, I guess I'll see you two around...take care"

"Thank you, I don't know how to thank you..."  
"You just did"

"Yeah..but-"

It's Okay Chizuru. If I have to pay for it, I will. You should be allowed to have at least one outfit that doesn't match ours, after all you are a woman whether or not others are to know-I won't force you to wear it when you don't want to—although, I really do like it on you" He reminded her, and turned to Hina "Thank you in advance, I'm sure she will take good care of it"

With that, they bowed goodbye and the two left for home.

Haha, I didn't mean to make this fanfic so long-in my head, this seemed so much shorter than 5 chapters-there's 2 more XD...mind you, they aren't long chapters. I'm breaking up the original long-written document without any breaks, by what seems fitting to be a separate page/chapter, and they just feel better this way.


	6. Chapter 6

"Hey, our Fearless leader is back!" Sanosuke gave recognition to their arrival.

"Yes..." Suddenly Hijikata didn't know how to face everyone. He seemed to stiffen up a bit. He also realized he was completely sober, and everyone else was in probably still in the mood to tease.

"They're probably drunk enough to forget...I'll just let this pass, and go to bed. They'll forget in the morning...later morning"

The other boys were all sitting together in a circle, probably playing a card game of sort. Some of them didn't seem to know what they were doing. Heisuke was about to pass out. Saito seemed to have already gone to sleep, he was absent. It was like him anyway-he wasn't one to play card games when everyone else wasn't sober enough to remember the rules.

Yamazaki was just coming in. he must have been on watch, making sure they got back safely.

Before anyone could really react, Hijikata lead Chizuru past the boys. "I'm taking her to her room, than I'm going to bed...good night guys. I Guess I couldn't hold my sake after all—now I'm already having a hang over as you boys call it"

He was making some of that up, Chizuru knew-but to avoid confronting the men about their absence, he was willing to make a white lie.

"I am actually quite tired" Hijikata confirmed."You should go to bed as well"

"I'll be okay...I'm going to stay up just a bit longer. I promise I'll go to bed soon"

Hijikata raised an eyebrow in concern disbelief, and said "Okay...don't let me catch you still awake in 5 hours-I can't have you passed out on the floor with those silly boys"  
"You know they won't do anything"

"I know...I just...I feel like your mine now, I want to protect you. That also means I want you to sleep"

"Oh...Hijikata, you're one to talk..I have to force you to eat some days! And I have to come in and make sure you are resting when you get injured" She gave him a worried look.

Hijikata laughed to himself. "There's just no use fooling or getting past you...now, go to bed"  
"No, let me see you sleep first-you need it more than I do"

He sighed "Alright. I'm going to bed...you can make sure of that" looking down in defeat, Hijikata smiled.

She walked with him to his quarters. Hijikata stepped inside. "So,.."

"Nope, you have to actually lay down and go to sleep. I don't want to see you near any papers"

Hijikta sighed. He actually sounded more amused, like he was enjoying this more than he was willing to show. There was something in him that actaully liked being bossed by a woman-because he rarely let anyone outrank him unless they were of military status-except for her. She has power over him.

Just before he would let Chizuru leave, who was standing there observing him, he walked up to her slowly, putting one arm around her waist, and the other hand cupping her face. Before she could say anything, he kissed her. Chizuru didn't object, but rather fell under. She kissed him back as soon as he was about to loosen his grip on her, causing him to feel excited. He deepened his lips on hers, gently holding her body closer to him. Chizuru slowly put her right arm over his shoulder, her left resting on his chest.

They let go moments later, gasping for breathe. Something about being short of breath made them more willing to lose it again, their hearts pounding. Hijikata felt desire creep into him. He would not do anything to harm her, but he wanted to play, just a little. He wanted to tease her.

Chizuru didn't seem in a mood to object, but if she did, he would stop.

Hijikata slowly moved back towards her again. He let her trace his movement, to stop him if she wanted. His lips went for hers...and than they slowly traced to her neck. He paused for a moment. Chizuru did nothing. She seemed to have enjoyed it. He continued to put his lips against her neck. He slowly kissed her, getting a gasp. She wanted him.

Hijikata stopped. He went to close his door, incase of his suborbinates decided to walk by. He liked his privacy.

Chizuru only stared at him, speechless. He went back to her, gently holding her as if she was fragile.

"Tell me to stop whenever you wish" he murmured in a serious, yet affectionate tone.

He continued to kiss her neck, slowly. He was in no hurry to be anywhere. He also had no intention of taking advantage of her-she would leave this room still flowered-just a bit less perfect.

"Hijikata..."

He stopped momentarily

She put her hand on his back. He saw this as a sign—wait, did she want to go farther? He was ...he would just continue his little act, that's all.

Just as he moved his mouth across her neck, she wimpered, grasping him.

"No Chizuru...I can't-"

Before he could continue his words, pain thumped inside his chest.

"Not here...not now! He gasped, holding his head.

"Hijikata!" Chizuru changed form amused to genuinely worried...she looked around.

"I don't have any medicine with me...I-"Before he finished, he saw Chizuru cut herself"

"Chizuru, don't do that..you can't hurt yourself for me"  
"I love you, and I'll keep you alive, I promise. Now, just drink okay?"

"Chizuru..." He sighed in defeat. "Fine...just, please don't hurt yourself...don't look, I'm going to leave a mark on your neck"

She gently loosened her kimono, leaving her upper back bare.  
"it's okay, it will heal fast" she squeeked, not quite ready, but it didn't really hurt all too much. It was a small wound. He wrapped his arms around her from behind, his lips closing in towards her nape.

Hijikata's red eyes and white hair began to fade as he licked the blood off her neck, ever so carefully. He continued till he was back to normal, but as soon as the wound healed, he wasn't ready to give up his place. She was calm about his actions, taking happiness in being in need. He noticed her bare upper back facing him...clearly she left it there on purpose...Hijikata spend time kisssing her where he left a wound that was now healed, and trailed his mouth across to the middle of her shoulders, and down her lower back. Chizuru held onto his arms still wrapped across her, relaxing. She felt his breathe on her, their hearts again beating, but quieter, but seemed to increase the more he moved his lips across shoulder blades. He began to grow a desire inside again, his kissing changing, he dragged his lips across her back. He felt their chests beat in unison as he moved her sleeve off to the side, exposing her one shoulder, his lips moving in to replace her fabric. She gasped, holding his arm tighter.

Hijikata stayed still, breathing lightly on her, Chizuru relaxed in response. Had he stayed any more still, she'd wonder if he had gone to sleep.

"Hijikata?"

"I'm right here..."

"You definitely think you love me right?"

"No...I know I do" he smiled, closing his eyes.

"I'm happy..."

"I too"

Silence came over them. They listened to the leaves sway in the breeze outside, their hearts still.

It was a good type of silence.

What felt like hours went by, Hijikata started to fall asleep, Chizuru felt his grip on her waist loosen. She had completely lost track of time with him.

Hijikata opened his eyes. "I think I should go to bed now" he spoke tiredly.

"I think so too...the others have probably passed out by now"

Hijikata chuckled"No, it's likely they may not. Maybe Heisuke, though"

"I'll just make sure I sneak back to my room quietly"

"As much as I hate to admit it, it's probably best you don't be seen. Yamazaki probably knows anyway, don't bother worrying about him".

"Good night,..Hijikata"

"Good night...Chizuru-chan" he said quietly.

Chizuru blushed and slowly opened the door. She looked around but saw no one, and snuck outside, closing the door behind her.

Hijikata touched his head, feeling a bit dizzy. So much had happened-and he had to admit, sake sometimes left side effects no matter how little you drank..well, for him anyway. He didn't drink often.

As Chizuru found her room, she carefully opened the door, closed it and grabbed her evening clothes over in the corner to change out of her new kimono. She smiled at it, and put it aside. Falling asleep was no task as she had already began to drift off within moments of laying down. She hugged her blanket, muttering "Hijikata", like a romanced girl she was, and fell asleep.

Hijikata changed quickly and went to sleep about as fast, smiling.


	7. Chapter 7

As mid-noon came, everyone was already up. The few boys that had been drunk were all over the floor. Saito, Kondou and Sannan had retired to their rooms. They woke up earliest and were already eating. It must have been the food that awoke the others. Saito gave a look of being non impressed, but shoved a bowl of rice in their direction.

It had been completely normal, had both Hijikata and Chizuru both been here, or at least one of them. It happened to be that both were asleep.

Seeing the mischievous look in their eyes, Saito merely exclaimed "Don't bother them. I'm sure you don't want Hijikata to kill you"

"You know he won't..."

"But he'll surely consider putting you in charge of the bathrooms. Why pay other men to clean when he can make you do it?"

"Also, Yamazaki-san isn't here either...although he rarely is.."

"Ninjas have other work to do"

"I'm kind of jealous of ninjas sometimes" Sanosuke scratched his head.

"Why?"Sannan asked.

"Well, they get to leave whenever they want-what if he isn't even doing anything? You know, chilling on the roof?...it's not like we can even inspect him if he's on the roof" Sanosuke grumbled.

"I'm sure he gets himself into worse predicaments than we do-even with you around" Shinpachi added, ignoring himself.

"Eh? Oh, and you don't contribute?"

"Heck no!"

Saito felt diversion was well-done. He had a higher understanding of his leaders and respected their space-if only others would have more faith. The commotion woke up Heisuke, who added himself in somehow. Before they could question any more, Chizuru had walked by.

"Good Morning!" She spoke, standing in the doorway. She smiled like she often did when greeting them.

"Oh hey, Chizuru" Shinpachi turned, greeting her.

"What's everyone up to?"

"Just sitting around. Heisuke is still asleep, so we can't bug him"

"I see.." she responded, looking around.

"What's up?"

"Oh, nothing. I just noticed not everyone is awake."

"Don't worry about it...I don't really expect everyone to be-I can't quite remember why though..."

Chizuru blinked. "Well, you were drunk last night, for one..."

"...oh, right!"

She sighed. Boys have bad memories already.

"Anyway...let's all have breakfast" Sannan interupted. "I'm rather hungry-and now that more of us are up, I guess the rest will just have to wake up"

"Yeah, snooze, you loose! Heisuke is going to be so angry"

"Ohwell, he can eat later" was Sannan's reply. He didn't seem sympathetic when his stomach was an issue.

As everyone ate, Hijikata had entered, very inconspicuously. He was not sure how to confront his kin about his absense. After he come to the conclusion that maybe thinking about it was just not worth it, he sighed, and put on his straight face. Maybe it wasn't a big deal.

In the reality of things, he was their leader, why fear them?

"_But they tease me relentlessly_" he scowled to himself. Wait..was he being self-conscience? That wasn't a good thing-he cares about their opinions...

Probably because they all have a fairly tight kinship, maybe it was only natural to care...but it was his right to claim what he wanted, they had no objection! As long as it didn't controverse the rules he invented himself, he was allowed.

"_No, they have none...but they could make things awkward_"

"Morning, Vice-Commander" was a voice. He was startled for a second, completely interupted.

"Oh, Good Morning Sanosuke" he replied.

"You must have been really out of it to have slept so long"

"Hey, our leader needs to rest sometimes-he has _us_ to deal with!" Shinpachi grinned, and Okita smiled in response.

Hijikata sighed. "You are quite a handful sometimes...but at least I know my allies are loyal".

Chizuru held a bowl of breakfast. "Here, Hijikata-san...everyone else has eaten"

"Except Heisuke"

"I'm not surprised. Tell him he has to do Chizuru's chores if he doesn't wake up within an hour-it's already past early afternoon. I am ashamed to have slept so long, forgive me"

"I-I don't need him to do my work, don't worry about it"

"No no, it's only fair. It's his for drinking more than he should, he has no dignity when it comes to sake"

" I guess you are right. What am I do to do than?"

"You can accompany Yamazaki for his errands today. He has some business in town, mostly non-life-threatening"

Chizuru's face brightened up. She loved going outside the headquarters. As she looked outside, she realized just how nice it was. The sun was shining brightly, with birds chirping without the gardens. Seeing this made her only more excited.

"When am I going?"

"He's just getting ready. He'll probably be another 15 minutes, just relax for now"

Hijikata had his usual serious face, his business tone speaking clear.

Sannan however noticed a hint of something else. He said nothing and continued eating, a wry grin played his face, than disappeared before anyone noticed.

"In any case" Hijikata started, "I want the rest of you to do your patrols. Heisuke will stay behind." he paused. "Sannan-san, I want you to check on the Rasetsu-afterwards stand guard at the entrance"

"Understood" Sannan nonchalantly, getting up.


	8. Chapter 8

After they finished eating, Hijikata dismissed his men. He waited until they had all left, and than looked at Chizuru.

"I'm not sure what to do about this..." getting her attention.

Chizuru looked at him questioningly "I'm sure it will be okay. They might tease, but I think they would understand" She smiled.

He sighed heavily in defeat, facing the floor. "I guess so.", looking towards her again.

"I know so" she responded, her smile beaming into him.

"You are always so optimistic, maybe I should be too" He agreed, lightening his expression.

"And if they say anything rude, you can tell them it was my fault"

"Wait, what are you saying? It's not your fault-it's..."  
"Well, it isn't quite yours, Hijikata-san. I'm the one who wasn't supposed to be here"  
"Now, don't say that!" Hijikata protested, gesturing of worry.

"Well, it's sort of true, right?"

"It might have been when we found you, but you are one of us now. We look after our own...I am not willing to lose more lives...so, I've lightened the rules a bit." He murmured. "It's not as if I'm willing to throw away yours, either. If any man touches you, he'll regret it" his voice raised a bit. "For the best of everyone, I hope none of mine touch you either. I don't mind everyone being close friends here, but I won't allow them to get out of hand"

"I sure hope I won't cause any problems..."

"As far as I'm concerned, you are my master's mistress-and that means you are an equal life to my master. I will protect you with my life and not opinionate on whether or not it is wrong. Hijikata-sama may have anyone by his side as long as she does not interfere with our operations, but it is not my duty to judge so". Was a familiar voice behind them.

"Yamazaki-kun!" Chizuru blurted, clearly surprised.

Hijikata merely turned, gazing at his friend with mutual understanding.

"Don't have to call me master, you are the same level as the others in our happy circle-I'd be proud about being the only one who can do your work here."

Yamazaki smirked silently, flattered. "Perhaps you are right...but I don't seem to fit in because of my different ways"

"I've thought of hiring another, but I think we are best staying in smaller numbers, with how quickly we have to move around now. Perhaps Chizuru would be interested in learning to assist you.."

Hijikata suggested. "She doesn't always have to be cleaning up after us, we can clean our own mess if we have to" Hijikata spoke humbly.

"I wouldn't want to put her in danger..."

"You'd do her a favor. She wants to be of help to us, sometimes I have such a hard time keeping my composure..."he grinned, sighing. "At least teach her how to be quick on her feet-I worry when she's alone-I don't like sending her outside"

Yamazaki gave a sympathetic smile "You are far more caring than you are willing to admit. Very well, I'll let her learn. As long as she promises not to use anything I teach her to put herself in harm's way", his look directed now at Chizuru.

"I promise...I won't be a hindrance"

"I didn't say that.." he exclaimed, feeling upset.

"No, but I will try to not worry you"

"Please"

"I'm going to teach you the art of escape"

"Eh?" Chizuru expected more

"Don't underestimate it" Yamazaki wised."It is not cowardly to fight another day-choose your battles and live"

"I guess I understand why most samurai clans aren't fans of ninja" Chizuru frowned in pity. She hadn't quite thought about the rare relationship until now.

"Indeed...they believe we are cheats, cowards and liers. Most will not hire us unless they come to no other option...but that's just how it is"

"Most lords known for ill behaviour are rumoured to keep shinobi-they treat them like pets, and will unleash them when they cannot deal with their own problems...those men are the real cowards" Hijikata added, his arms folded, his face stern, "Honestly, I can't stand those users. Shinobi have to train much harder than most warriors to be virtually invisible, to kill without evidence-yet they get used like dogs. Most will sell themselves to the highest bidder, offering their services...they are meant to be ruthless killers...probably the closest thing to an Oni in the human world" Hijikata smirked.

"That is hardly funny, but I suppose it's true" Yamazaki admitted, eyes shut in defense.

"Haha...no offense intended, of course"

"None are taken"  
Hijikata sighed. Yamazaki had proven his point-shinobi were self-instructed tools when need be, passive and tolerant even if insulted-they were meant to endure many things-but sometimes he wished Yamazaki would be offended, it was only fair.

"Yamazaki-kun is far from ruthless" Chizuru observed.

"Perhaps not now, maybe when I'm working" Yamazaki smiled calmly.

"You are so casual about it"  
"Yes, I can't let myself get worked up over it, it's my job" He replied, in a matter-of-fact tone.

"Anyways..." Hijikata interupted, "You should get going now. I have work to do too, so, I'll see you both later. Take care of her." He turned toward the doorway.  
"You know I will" Yamazaki replied.

"Yes, that's an order" He grinned back,"No weird stuff-I don't want to see her slaughtering people at night"

"Hey! That's not funny! You know I won't do that" Chizuru defended.

Hijikata laughed. "Of course not, I believe you".

Chizuru frowned.

"Cheer up. I'll see you when you get back" Hijikata stepped outside the room and went to his quarters. He had planned to work on his writing, or Kondou's assignments, really.

"At any rate, let's get out" Yamazaki turned his attention to Chizuru, who smiled in response.

"All right"


	9. Chapter 9

They crouched silently on a low roof. She had a hard time getting up, but he assisted her-it wasn't all too high, but she wasn't exactly a ninja or a delinquent offspring, either.

The alleyway was quiet. _Not much to observe_, aside from rodent. She sometimes wondered if he could hear her thoughts. .

"There's more to be seen than your eyes tell you" He answered her ponders.

"Can you read their thoughts too?" she asked.

"No..." he stammered, "Not really...". Yamazaki wasn't often asked about his abilities.

"Oh...I see." Chizuru returned to her forward-focused gaze, silent.

They were observing a building. Not too exciting..but it was his job. He was far too focused on finding details to be wondering off in thought.

"_I've been on a roof twice this week_" Chizuru thought to herself randomly. It just occurred to her how strange her life had gotten.

Before she could think to herself further, a door opened across the alley, in their view. Yellow light poured out the doorway, an obvious sign of life. A man stepped out, talking to the other or others residing inside.

"This is where we do our job" Yamazaki murmured under his tone, nodded, eyeing him.

"Good, than I'll see you tomorrow...make sure you-know-what is not mentioned-I'll be sure you won't screw that up, right?" the middle-aged man, dressed in western gear, spoke. His tone was serious, yet smelled of carelessness and slight alcohol consumption. He wasn't being very discreet considering the nature of his words.

The man waved, walking away. He went down the alley on the left, pacing himself casually. Nothing seemed to bother him-rather, he seemed confident he wouldn't be watched.

As the suspect began to walk out sight, Yamazaki gestured Chizuru to stay as he quickly leaped to the roof to his left. He wanted to at least see if this man was meeting anyone on his way out.

Yamazaki returned,"We can go now. This is all I needed to do here".

"Don't you need to write anything down?" She questioned.

"No, I'll remember. I already written his words while you were watching just in case" he held out a folded paper.

"Oh, you are fast"

"I have to be" he smirked kindly.

He helped her down the roof, trying to show her how to position herself for a better drop.

"I'm going to give you tips to running away now. I know that sounds very cowardly in words, but we aren't samurai-were supposed to survive long enough to deliver messages, at least if anything-it kind of makes our worth go up" he retorted sarcastically "What is a good shinobi if he can't even escape silently".

"That sounds harsh"  
"Yeah, but so does seppuku..I think I like my job better" he sneered a smile "Anyway... before you learn to run fast-as that comes with practice, obviously...you should at least learn to use your surroundings"

"Like my environment, got it" She smiled.

"Yes...but most people don't even see half the things that are of use to them. Sticks and rocks aren't the only objects. Use everything"

He glanced around for a second. "Like that wooden box to your left. Not only can it be thrown, but you can trip close-attackers by placing it quickly on the ground behind you. Also, if it's big enough, hide in it. Even if they find you, you can push them over or hit their face with it as you lift it off yourself"

"Wow, that sounds so devious" Chizuru laughed.

"That's right-be devious. It's survival, so anything goes"

"Also, using dirt is helpful too. It will make them cough if in the face, not to mention it irritates the eyes. If it's dusty enough outside, you can obscure their vision enough to get away."

She merely nodded, considering his words, allowing him to continue.

"If there is an object containing water-or any substance, use it."

She glanced by habit to see if he was looking at any such object. She saw none, and turned her attention back.

"If you have a broken weapon, throw it. It doesn't matter if a sword is dull, it still hurts. All objects have their advantages...you'll come to notice most of them are actually useful if used correctly—or rather, incorrectly...but in our case, anything goes." Just of course, do not abuse that knowledge.

"I would never think of it-but it bothers me to think this way" she frowned.

"It might touch your guilty conscience, but sometimes it's better to be aware than not to be"

"I guess, yeah..." she muttered in thought.

"If you feel uncomfortable with anything, tell me. Some things however are just a part of staying alive-and we do want you to live." Yamazaki reassured her, looking at her sternly.

He put his arms up in a exaggerated defeat "Plus, if Hijikata found out you were seriously hurt, what would I do? Surely he would hurt me, maybe kill me-can't have that happen now, he's a scary oni vice-commander" He smiled.

Chizuru chuckled, her face lightened.

She didn't see the guy around often enough to see him crack jokes...he did have a sense of humour like anyone else. Not all ninjas were jerks, right? Some weren't exactly killing fiends.

"Well, if you are that good, I don't think he could catch you" She returned his humour.

"Possibly...I just really never imagine he would anyway...", he thought aloud, "It's not like I'm going to be putting you in these situations anyway"

The winds changed quietly, shifting in his mind. He could feel the breeze more as it sneaked passed the buildings that blocked it's reach moments before.

"There are some things you will learn eventually-it all comes with disipline if you are willing to go that far—it's really best to consider some of this" He shared, "We should get going now though"

Yamazaki began to walk down the alleyway, Chizuru trotting after him. They weaved around random buildings to avoid any visitors down the main backway.

The destination wasn't the most important part in escape-just constantly evade the traffic of other lifeforms and remain hidden until you had time to think about where you were heading.

That was his main objective some missions-to merely survive.


	10. Chapter 10

By the time everyone returned, it had been between lunch and supper. Chizuru was willing to wait it out for supper until she felt her stomach growling, she looked at.

"Just eat something small" Yamazaki pulled cracker-like snacks out of a pouch.

"Oh, thanks. I hope it's okay"

"No, go ahead" he handed casually,"I'll get more later".

Sanosuke and Shinpachi were outside talking amonst themselves, Okita hanging around the corner. Sannan sat thoughtfully nearby. Saito was standing by, looking at at tree.

The hq was rather calm.

Chizuru sat down to join the quiet.

Yamazaki looked to have thought of joining in, but seemed to have other things on his mind. He turned, heading towards the main rooms and disappeared. Chizuru layed her head on her hands and leaned against a pillar on the wooden balcony.

Inside voices and silence were heard for most of the remaining hours before meal time. Okita and Saito relaxed watching the birds go about their business, Sannan writing some form of poetry, or so Chizuru thought. Perhaps she was being naïve considering, since nature was inspirational for haiku. He was probably researching Rasetsu or battle tactics, she felt was more realistic. The latter she preferred.

"Time to eat" a familiar calm voice.

"Hijikata-san".Chizuru shined, turning to face the figure. He noticed her, smiling briefly in return.

"Guys?" he repeated.

"Yeah, Vice-Commander" Sanosuke looked around the corner "we're coming".

Hijikata proceeded back into the building.

"_He must be preoccupied_" She thought momentarily. She stood up, waited, and continued indoors with the boys, who seemed far too relaxed to be willing to leave their place. Shinpachi moaned but obeyed without further complaint.

Filing in without a fight, the men sat down. Chizuru continued to walk past,heading for the kitchen. "Don't worry about it Chizuru, I got it" Hijikata answered her presence.

"You sure?"

He questioned himself for a second.

"I can help, let me" She offered, elegantly stepping in, and picking up several plates.

"You are getting too good at this" his eyebrows raised, a defeated smile.

She returned his with a more worried, defeated look. "You work harder than I", she replied as she left the room.

"Aw yes, I'm feeling so much more hungry now that I can smell it" Heisuke watched her carry the food in.

"Me moreso now that I see it" Shinpachi grinned.

Sanosuke and the others quietly accepted theirs and began to eat. They were clearly pacified enough, not stirred by much at all. "Thanks" Saito replied politely.

As she finished, Hijikata met her in the kitchen, holding her plate. "Don't forget to eat" he spoke.

"I won't", she laughed,"I'm actually quite hungry".

Would have been not so obvious if her stomach hadn't grumbled again.

Hijikata observed pacifistic, a faint smile on his face.

"Everyone is so calm and mellow today"

"It is a nice day...I'm not sure if it gets any nicer this time of month sometimes-but it's worth taking advantage of" his head turned, facing outside. Nature had it's ways with him as he was lost in thought, the branched leaves taking his stress with the wind. She watched him, smiling.

"Now, I think it's time to go join the men" He broke off his concentration with such suddenness that he started her.

"Oh! Right..I guess we should" she laughed to herself, embarrased. They surely were going to bug them now-being absent for 10 minutes during meal time.

"Were already almost done, you guys are slow" Shinpachi grinned, stuffing his face.

"Well, I can see why-you are probably going to get cramps at that rate anyway, Shinpachi" Hijikata joked.

They sat down and started eating, Hijikata taking note of the full bowl of food on the floor as his.

"At any rate, so...we dealt with some chochou rats today. Only 5 mind you, but they were causing trouble-nothing real suspiciously alarming, but being a pain in the ass" Sanosuke seemed to breathe same air as Shinpachi, who was so full of vigor, that it rubbed off on Sanosuke at some point.

"Doing what?"

"They figured they could get away with ripping off some merchants, selling fake goods and such. One of them tried to steal one's daughter, but like hell I'd let that happen" he pointed at himself, stating he dealth with the man on his own.

"Ah, but Sanosuke managed to break his nose" Heisuke taddled.

"You speak like it's a bad thing..."  
"Well you sort of made us look like brutes" Heisuke swallowed his rations.

"If there's anything I can add to this,' Sannan added'"It's that Heisuke will never give off the appeal of a brute-so matter what we do, you will always be there to remind everyone how harmless we are", His voice a hint of smart retort, amused with his contribution.

Heisuke growled, turning his head the other way, continued eating.

Hijikata sighed,"How about we get along, the weather is having a positive influence on everyone else, I feel like joining in"

Saito contently agreed.

"So, how was Chizuru's day?" Sannan asked politely.

"Oh.."she had zoned out, "It was good"  
"Just so?"  
"well no. Yamazaki-san and I erranded, and I'm being taught his way" Hijikata gave her a silencing look. He didn't like his ninja's techniques shared amongst groups, "so basically I'm just being told to be a bit more aware, I guess next time Kazama shows up I'll be able to hide from him" She added, making some of it dumbed on purpose.

If she had not appeared so zoned out, Sannan may not have believed her.

"Sounds like a good idea...there are always times we can't show up in the split of a second, I agree with this" He finished agreeably.

"Anyone interested in helping clean up? Most of the other men are off early today"

Heisuke snorted, making Hijikata's humble eyes harden to a stare.

"Okay, okay...I'll help" he hesitantly threw himself into the kitchen, Hijikata watching.

"That is why it's so peaceful today" Sanosuke raised his arms in careless doubt.

"Not quite...but it sure is far quieter" Hijikata agreed.

Chizuru glanced at the group.

"I'm going to go outside" she lightly stood and walked out.

"Someone is in a good mood" Okita smirked, eyeing Hijikata suspiciously.

"It seems everyone is" He corrected, not looking at anyone in particular. It would be nice to direct the attention to more logical means, he thought. Far more so.

"Yes, but especially today"  
"How so?"

"She's zoning out a lot"  
"And..your point?"  
"She isn't worrying about anything..."  
"Neither are you" Hijikata retorted, showing lines of aggravation on his forehead.

"I guess I can save this for a more stressful-present day, perhaps you are right" he gave in.

"Anyway...why don't we all go outside-it would be good for us" Saito intervened, to Hijikata's favor. He got up and strided outside with placid calmness.

Hijikata followed, walking past Okita.

The rest followed.

"Personally, I feel like sparring" Saito added as the men neared him, standing in middle of the open grass, "it is far too beautiful to just be sitting-let our blades clash in honor of our good fortune".  
"I'll be up to that" Hijikata smiled, removing his sword from it's sheath.

"Saito could be a poet, you know...you'd make good money off it one day" Okita smiled, eyes closed in defeat, his palms facing up.


	11. Chapter 11

Saito stood still a moment. He waited on Hijikata, whom approached, and stopped, his sword held infront with both hands. Saito slowly unsheathed his katana without a word, as the two samurai eyed one another, waiting.

They stood silent.

Timing was crucial in art of Samurai duels-both motionless, waiting on the other.

As silence ended, Saito made a movement-which was retaliated by Hijikata's advance, blocking his own. They stood for a moment, as if silently acknowledging their situation, than backed out, and held stance, ready.

As Saito's left hand readjusted on his hilt, Hijikata went on alert. Suddenly a form rushed to his blind side, just past the corner of his sight. Hijikata gracefully turned to block, just in time-Saito often had the upper hand in battle-except Hijikata knew he was left-handed, and had preferred different sides to target. Saito smirked acknowledgedly.

With his stronger hand, Hijikata began to use his blocking sword to push Saito, as he moved his opponent's sword into a lock, side-stepping, and broke out. Saito readjusted his sword and position, holding a defensive.

Hijikata took the first strike. Saito blocked, allowing the energy to flow through his sword, dissipating out from his feet-allowing him to withstand the shock of the blow with relative ease. He knew his overall power behind the sword was weaker-but his technique was to word around such men. Without delay, Saito barred his Commander's sword, moved in into desired space, and dodged into his personal space-His left-handed katana at the man's throat.

They stood like statues posing for a painter's eye-both in dynamic posture-their minds steady and focused, and their demeanor strong and silent—the silence was powerful, an unspoken sign of two warriors holding their life-learned enlightenment.

The wind was still grazing the trees gently, an air of calmness enveloped them.

Hijikata, though sword at his throat, did not flinch. Saito was not afraid of cutting-for they both knew each other's skills, a trust mended over time, both masters of their own art. They did not fear cutting because they knew it would not cut.

Had it been a stranger, they would be prepared for accidents, but not between two comrades who could read each other's intentions.

Saito's mind was the most placid and mysterious-he was not as intent on frontal attacks, but preferred to counter-attack,-than strike at the concise moment. Hijikata was more daring-he would use his ferocious demeanor, his reputation-and forge his strong will together to become a formidable foe. He was aware of his weaknesses, and turned them into strengths-not blind madness, but focused intensity-to make the one important, he could endure immense pain. He was stubborn and brave-a born leader...even if he did not think so himself. He was the most powerful with something to protect-that is when most men feared him.

Hijikata smirked, Saito removing his sword from his neck, and stepped back again. Hijikata got up and did the same.

Saito changed to offensive, his foot a slight movement. Hijikata took the cue-They shifted slight one last time, than

Hijikata and Saito burst towards one another, their footsteps the only sound-they clashed, their swords sung as they glinted the day's sunlight.

Chizuru's eyes sparkled, awakened by their incredible display of bushido. It livened everyone up, that singing clang of steel, it shown in their faces. It seemed to be what they all lived for, what they were raised years to acknowledge-to get the perfect sounds in battle...it was like the test of finding one's rival admist a field of swords, and what they would die for, had they lived to see that day.

The two let their focused expressions ease into a more relaxed, satisfying state, a friendly smirk of recognition.

They effortlessly sheathed their opposite-handed swords, clicking into place. They turned their heads to face the other men. Hijikata's attention drew short though as his eyes traced to the right, Chizuru. His gaze held a few many seconds with her excited face,with a calm smile, his eyes back to his men whom were not really paying attention, but to avoid his obvious distraction anyway.

"Saito and Hijikata are matched"

Saito grinned in flattery, but replied "No, Hijikata is not at his best today"

"...Yeah, I guess you're right-he seems to be a bit too into the weather" Okita smugged.

Hijikata frowned "What's that supposed to mean?"he retorted.

"Well, the sun is out, the air is nice-it's quite relaxing, and the company is quite too"he slying hinted.

"Ah, you mean the lack of company-our men are all not here" Hijikata evaded.

"...Perhaps you are right" Okita's smug smile hid behind his submissive voice.

"Anyway", Saito interupted, "I think I'm going to for a moment"

Okita's smug face reappeared "Okay, Zen"  
"Please do not call me that.."  
"Right...well, I guess I'll be going too-hey Sanosuke, let's go hit town!" Okita could play this game too.

"Yeah, sure, why not. Shinpachi?"  
"I'll come"

"Hey...what about me?" Heisuke butted in.

"Oh, I guess you can come..." Sanosuke joked.

Everyone seemed to have left.

If Hijikata hadn't known better...

"Hijikata-san?" ,was her soft voice.

"Hm?"

"I know it's a bit strange...but let's just hang out ourselves than...I mean strange that, they seemed to all just-"  
"-It's okay, Chizuru. I actually feel relieved" he sighed briefly. My mind was not clear-I don't really like to be observed fighting in that state" he mumbled.

Chizuru stood quiet, understanding.  
"So, what do you want to do?"  
"There's a festival in town, right?...I kind of want to see that" her face shone of hidden interest. She mustve been trying to hide it form him, to avoid distracting the men from their work...but she really wanted to go. He could tell.

"All right" he sighed his tone, of voluntary submission. A relaxed smile crossed his face. "So let's go", he grabbed her arm gently and gestured they leave.  
"W-wait, we don't have to hurry" She spooked off guard.

"This is what we decided to do, and you want to go-so, let's hurry so we don't miss it" his serious tone sounded with a hint of joy-his eyes glinted gently. Her spook turned to admiration, as she nodded and began to walk with him-his pace quickening-as if he was going to tend to some serious business.

"_This is truly one of the best days-even Hijikata seems to have taken up the sun in his eyes"_she smiled to herself.

As she caught up to his pace, his hand seemed to relax at the lack of tension on her arm, she felt it ease near her wrist—he was almost, even if unintentionally in any way-close to grasping her small, vulnerable hand. She tingled with butterflies at the thought, wondering what it was like to hold his.

If only she knew how serious his business was-he wanted to see her smile-without a single hint of worry or stress over anyone else-he wanted to see her real smile, the one he knew he'd fallen in love with. _If only you knew, _He ached.

a


	12. Chapter 12

I wasn't just going to leave this, I had every plan to update! And where it was, I had no reason to have a writers block :P-there's just too much to make of this event

* * *

As they arrived, streets had been filled with people, every age and clan alike came to join. Flutes and drums filled the air, decorative petals floating quietly. Kimonos and haori's of many colors made for a vibrant crowd. The air was full of energy, inviting anyone nearby.

Chizuru looked around in awe, Hijikata observed her reactions unnoticed. If hadn't known better, she rarely had been to festivals during her childhood. Chizuru watched entertainers across the road, the crowd shouting over him in excitement.

Just as She was turning back to reality, Hijikata slyly grabbed her hand, his face a match for his bold move. Feeling his gentle fingers graze hers, she felt a slight shock go up her, turning her head towards him in question. He merely smiled, raising his eyebrows in empathy.

She smiled back, cheeks blushed pink. She grasped his hand that held hers, as he led her out towards the busy streets.

"I don't want you to get lost" he half-fibbed. He just wanted the luxury of being the one holding her dainty hand.

Down the left road, Chizuru just barely made out what was mythical characters in dressage dancing along the parade, following many other vibrant characters.

"Oh, I want to see that!" She exclaimed in joy.

"That I can do" He walked her down the path, still holding her hand.

As the characters came closer, she made out one to be a fox-like entity. "That's a kitsune, right? Hjikta-san?"

"Yea" He answered hesitantly.

"It is, isn't it?" she asked quizzically, feeling doubt in herself.

"Y-yeah...it's just..."

"Hmmm..?" She faced him curiously.

"Well-" sHijikata started,cratching his head nervously,"It's just...y-you don't have to call me by..my...last name. No one else is around, anyway...so-"

Chizuru chuckled.  
"What?" he blushed

"You're red, Hijikata-" she smirked.

"Toshi..zo..." he interupted rather slowly-as if trying to make sure he said it right, less she repeat his name wrong.

She smiled. "Okay...Toshizo"

Something about the way her voice played on the letters of his name put him into a state of tingling. He recovered soon enough, as she hadn't noticed his reaction soon enough.

"_I want her to say my first name more often, but I get a weird feeling in my stomach-...what the younger people call 'butterflies'" _He swallowed, than cleared his throat-face still red.

"hm!" Chizuru chuckled again. All he could really do was smile back, even though his beat-red face made him vulnerable, his eyebrow arched in submissive will-the will to voluntarily expose himself and shrug it off, as if he had no reason to hide it any longer.

* * *

Back at the headquarters, a couple of the boys had returned.  
"Hijikata-san?" Okita called, Sannan behind him. Shinpachi and Heisuke had just been looking for Chizuru to make sure she wasn't bored. The four met up shortly to realize both were missing.

"Hijikata-san isn't here".

"Nor Chizuru-chan" Shinpachi replied.

"That sneaky bastard" Okita grinned.

"He really did take advantage of us leaving...-just as I thought" Shinpachi smirked, a hint of mild jealously, "Eh, that's what we planned anyway-I'm rather having fun with this-he thinks he can hide from us?"

"Ohwell, it will be good for him-let them go out. Chizuru needs to get away from here anyway, I'm sure they went to the festival"

"Are we going too?" Heisuke asked.

"No..." Sannan responded for him, "Just leave them be-no need to embarrass the vice-commander...this field of battle is not something he's used to-letting go of himself over a woman"

"I guess so..."

* * *

"There is a game over there, do you want to play?" Hijikata asked.

"Sure, let's go!"

In front of her was a booth. The game host greeted her kindly, a big smile on his face.  
"Do you want to play, miss?"  
"Yes, she does" Hijikata answered for her, watching her stand helplessly.

"Oh? So this man insists, does he? I guess he's paying right?" the man joked.

"Indeed, I will be paying" Hijikata smirked back at the man, handing him change.  
"Right then! That will be worth 3 tries, so, go ahead, when you are ready, miss"

"Um...", Chizuru felt nervous. She hadn't played many of these games before, "I haven't played this game...before..."  
"What?" the man gaped, "Surely your family, or your dear man here has taken you before.."  
"No, acutally" she laughed nervously. "This is my first time..."  
Hijikata looked at her, unaware of what kind of childhood Yukimura had given her.

" I see...well, basically what you have to do is throw this ball here into the objects infront of you. There are three different types, some are easier to take down than others. You get a better prize for the more difficult ones"  
"Oh, okay" she smiled more confidently Hijikata's concern lifted with her.

As the man stepped aside, Chizuru tossed on of the spheres. It just barely hit an outside shape, but went for the ground. She frowned. Picking up another, she tossed it at the middle-skill ranged-throwing it off balance, but it stood.

"It's okay if you don't win" Hijikata reassured her, "It's just for fun anyway" he smiled. Feeling better, she nodded.

As she threw the last with more strength, they three watched as it went straight into the middle-range target, it's off-balance object easily falling to the side, to the ground.

"Whoa, there you go miss! You win something" he scrambled to the other side of the display, grabbing a cat-like figurine.

Handing it over to her, the yukata-garbed man's face told her that he enjoyed his job a lot.

"Thankyou, it is very cute" She observed her prize, the cat figurine colored in a deep purple-red with a small charm hanging off of it.

"See? That wasn't so bad...I didn't realize it was your first try, sorry..-"  
"Don't be, Hi-...Toshizo-san" she stumbled. His gaze met hers momentarily.

As they left the booth, Chizuru admire once more all the colorful dress the other folks were fashioning.

He took note.

"In any case...there are fireworks tonight...so um" his confidence faded..."If you want, I can let you dress up, too...if, only if-you wan't to..." He looked another direction, unsure of his own words.

"I wouldn't mind" she agreed, too easily?. She seemed to not have taken notice of his cause for embarrasment...,"I think Hijikata-san likes kimonos too..." He was seen right through., "But I don't mind...they are very pretty-I'll glady dress for him" She smiled, innocently wanting to be a woman for him-to be something he desired to have beside him. Not that she wasn't already, he would reply...but Chizuru knew just how beautiful a kimono was when worn well-how colors would play off the wearer, increasing the beauty of both the garment and the one wearing it. It was no surprise to think Hijikata admired such things-even a girl admired other's well-worn kimonos-they are an art form in themselves.

"If I can admire the ladies wearing such pretty clothes, I think you admire it even more"  
"No-no, that's not-"  
"I wasn't implying you were looking at the others...just that, if I can admire another's kimono...than...you surely must admire kimonos, too-that's why I think I'm fine with it...and plus, I can't remember the last time I got to wear one to a festival!" She shone.

His raised eyebrows of defeat told her she was right.

"There is indeed, no way to get past you" he shined back. His hand that had previously held hers touched her back lightly. "Let's go let you change, than-no reason to make you wear your everyday stuff-I'll find a clean haori for myself as well-no sense feeling out of place" he grinned, Chizuru nodding.

"But first...You are going to eat"He finished.


	13. Chapter 13

Feeding her was quite easy. His sister had been quite picky whenever they hung out, despite being older than he. Chizuru on the other hand, hadn't experienced enough of the festive food to really know what she didn't like.

"You have to eat too, you know" She finished her share. "If you don't...-"

"-You are not going to let me hear the end of it" He finished for her.

"Something like that"  
"Don't worry, I'll eat"

"When?" she demanded.  
"Right now"  
"Good..."  
"Well, I had to make sure you ate first-you are so small I wonder if your worries don't let you finish your meals" he joked, his hands in pretend defeat.

"Oh, the only worry I have sometimes is knowing you don't eat" she grumbled.

"Than I'll have to eat more often-can't burden you with my eating habits...that would be rather rude of me" he snorted back, humouring her.

Before he could start mouthing his food, the food server just had to make a comment.

"You two fight like a wedded couple" the man interupted, grinning. He toke amusement in their harmless arguing over each other's well being.

Chizuru blushed a deep shade, "No-no, uh...we.."

Hijikata didn't really know what to say, except...  
"I'll finish this on the way back-let us be on our way" He got up, grabbing her hand as he aided her towards their path home to headquarters.

Once they got far enough from the food booth, he started eating his rice bowl-well, except for the bowl of course.

"That was awkward" she laughed a quiet nervous laugh.

"Yes...um, sorry if I offended you by leaving right away.."  
"No, it's okay.

As Hijikata finished up his lunch, the two snuck their way into the building. Not to say they should need to, but he felt it would just cause a stir otherwise. Both felt rather awkward hiding behind the back.

"I hope we never have to hide like this again" She worried.  
"Yeah...me neither..." he spaced out a second..."Quick, go that way to your quarters. Meet me back here within 15-er um, however long it takes" he mumbled.

Chuckling at his discomfort regarding her dressing, she sneaked off into her room successfully.

He sighed a deep breath "_Hijikata_, _What do you get yourself into?"_ He grimaced, sneaking his way to his room.

He had returned already, realizing she must still be getting changed. He also remembered that she never put one on herself before, and sighed. This could take forever, she might need help...but there were no other woman around to help her. Not like he couldn't wait...it's just that, he felt they were in a rather helpless situation, him moreso.

As he was about to send off help from the woman who gave her the clothing, Sen appeared. "I already helped her" she smiled an expression that told him she beat him to his own errand.

"Uh...thanks...how?"  
"I'm an Oni, so of course I notice a few things you don't-although, it's probably just my woman's intuition that told me she needed help" she giggled,"Anyway...I'm going to leave, see you guys later-Just so you know, I'm always looking out for her, you have not to worry"

"Thanks...I appreciate it" He sounded genuine.

"You are a good man...See you guys around"

Before he could keep track of the direction she travelled, she was gone.

"Huh...Oni, eh?" He pondered blankly for a second...than realized, Chizuru was Oni-was she able to perceive things he thought she couldn't see?

Before he could answer his own question, Chizuru had just came around the corner, fully dressed in her silver garment.

The silver of course was not the only color, but it was dominant-a celestial color most woman could not afford, yet it was not so complex that it belonged on court ladies either.

The admirably dressed young woman he was in love with before he ever seen her in woman's clothes.

"Hijikata...I'm sorry I took so long"  
"It's okay" he calmed.

"You look...handsome..."Chizuru blushed.

He had been so worried that he nearly forgot he changed too. Dressed in a black haori and a striped hakama, with white shapes complimenting their dark counterparts-it was a very handsome outfit-and his jet-black hair, despite being shorter than it once was, seemed to play with the blacks already existant. There was the odd gold object-He had come to love the colors on his new battle gear-although, not quite as much as Chizuru did...she seemed to stare at him twice as much than she used to-it was hard not to notice, honestly.

"You ready?" was a pointless question on his part.  
"Yes, let's go-before our sneaking goes in vain" She smarted.

By the time they returned to the festive, it had been near supper time. Neither of them were hungry, and decided to look around at the performers and floats as they walked by.

However, walking in the direction they did was probably going to be something Hijikata would generally regret...but he was oblivious.

In a large, spaced-out crowd ahead, were small groups and couples-either friends or together, girls, men, and woman of various ages-most of them young adults or elders-had been watching someone speak over them.

It was when they all started to take stances across one another that he realized they were dancing.

"Oh..."Hijikata panicked inside, keeping cool.

Chizuru was curious, as she kept going closer.  
"I don't know about that..."  
"Why? What's wrong with them dancing?"  
"No, no...it's not them-it's just that..." he cleared his throat.  
"Hmm?" she looked at him innocently.

"That". He stated, as a well-dressed man in a clean-looking haori appearing to be one of the event hosts, taking notice of them. Taking notice of Hijikata...and Chizuru.

Apparently they were a bit too close to not be considered part of the event...or so this approach told him. He nervously looked the other way, pretending to not see him.

"Hey, what about you?" the man spoke, facing Him.

"Hmm?" he faked a blank.

"Don't you want to dance?"  
"Eh...well..." he muttered, trying to keep cool.

"Eh what? You have a pretty young lady right here...you can't just pretend you don't know how to dance!"  
"What if I don't?"  
"Oh, I know you do..."  
Hijikata flashed him a questioning look.

"You have probably observed so many of them, there's no way you can't know!"  
"That doesn't mean.."  
"Well, young lady? Would you?"

"I-I...uuhhh...don't...know..how-" 

"What? Both of you? Oh, here I'll teach you than, right here."

"Hey, what are you?-" Before anyone could react, Hijikata was being moved into position, and Chizuru after him.

He couldn't just make a scene and beat on the guy or yell at him like "I'm Hijikata from the Shinsengumi! Get your hands off me!"

No...that wouldn't work. He decided he had no choice but to live this one through. Hopefully his men were not here to see this.

His face spoke of true defeat-as if he was laying his reputation and dignity on the line.

-"And than this!" as the man made them move in coordination with the others.

As the two decided to play along and go with the way they were being pushed and prodded at in the back, Chizuru started to enjoy herself. Hijikata had no idea how being pushed around was so amusing.

"Okay, now, I'll leave you be-but I'll be watching you!"  
"What?...why?"

"Why? Because you are the man, it's your duty ensure she enjoys herself-if she doesn't want to, at least ask her first" he mumbled enthusiastically and took leave towards the crowd.

"It's not as bas as I thought...?"  
"I um...I guess, I might as well be a gentlemen...uh..." he cleared his throat, calming himself enough to speak.  
"Do you...er..", he started. The man was eyeing him intently from afar. He sighed."Do you want to...dance..?..."

That seemed to be the most painful thing he'd ever said.

"If that's something you are putting yourself on the line for to ask, self-conscience of a normal harmless man, "she chuckled" Than yes...Toshizo, I'll attempt to do as well"

He smiled. He wasn't sure if it was a relieved smile, happy, or just glad they were both in the same boat -and now can relate-smile...but either way, he felt a weight off his chest at her answer.

"Um, so..." Chizuru looked about, trying to remember exactly. She placed a hand on him, feeling a bit awkward in front of the other people. As she became to feel more self-conscience, hijikata felt the sudden urge to quail her fear. He took the initiative and put his hand on her waist, taking complete control of their strange situation by placing himself about her.

As they awkwardy moved around one another, they started to forget the man, and his crowd. Hijikata lightened up a bit, Chizuru's mouth no longer showing fear.

Taking less notice of her surroundings, she was caught in the same awe she did the day they had met-his hair, though shorter, was being brushed by the breeze that past them...but his gaze was even more admiring of her. He couldn't help notice her smile, how it played with her bits of hair that flew, and her kimono following her every movement. She made him want to touch her more affectionately. Later, he decided.

Before they really got any good what was called dancing, both were too tired to really bother to go on. He held his hand out, smiling his eyebrow look.

She took his offer, and placed her hand in his, as they walked away.

"What else is there to see?"

"Plenty" He glanced, looking for what plenty left she had not seen.

"I admit I'm hungry" He interjected.  
"Yeah, me too...thirsty as well"

"I can't say I do this very often-especially so willingly"  
"Than I"m glad you did-it makes me feel...um" she blushed, looking for a word. 

"Special?"

Something about the way his tone worded touched her-like he let a part of his heart escape without meaning to.

"Yes..." he looked at her.

He held his fixed look, but didn't think it was the time or place to say what what played on his heart.

"Let's go get something to eat" he interrupted softly.

"Okay" her face softened back.

"_Butterflies" _he mumbled to himself_"No, you are a butterfly-well hidden until you decide to show yourself, but very lethal to me..and yet I love it. Surely, something is wrong with me...and I can't seem to want to change it. I must be nuts."_


	14. Chapter 14

Guiding their way through the masses, the couple managed to find the food stands back. _It must be the time everyone chooses to eat_, Chizuru though to herself.

"Once we can find a spot to sit, or...do you want to find somewhere else to eat?" he turned to face her.

"I'm fine with whichever"

"Okay. We'll find a less busy place-I have a feeling it won't get any slower for the next half hour or so" he stated, eyes looking back and forth through crowd.

"I think I want Yakisoba" Chizuru decided.

"Okay-I'll pay for it"  
"Thanks" she smiled, but felt a bit guilty. She forgot to mask it though.

"Don't worry about about it...it's the least I can do" he smiled.

Making his way to the table, Hijikata payed up and handed her their food as soon as it was made. She handed him his plate after he put his money away, both than escaped the hungry line ups for a shaded tree on the outskirts of the streets. Others had the same idea, but there was still enough space for them to have privacy-and quiet;plenty of shade was left.

Hijikata sat down infront of the large tree trunk, Chizuru kneeled beside him.

"This is far better-I don't know who can stand eating in a stuffy crowd" he breathed in relief.

"I know what you mean...but at least people are happy"  
"Yea...just, I like to eat in peace" he looked at her contently.

She nodded in agreement.

They ate quietly. Neither had as much to say when they were quite hungry, but the silence wasn't awkward. The voices nearby made up for any silence they may have had anyway.

Hijikata ate rather contently, you'd wonder if he was born noble sometimes, but it was just in his nature. Chizuru, trying to be extra polite, ate slower than he-she also seemed to be simply enjoying the environment and company. Hijikata was, too, but sometimes he felt embarrassed to show his more poetic-embracing side. It would be sure something if she even saw any of his attempts in poetry—not that he was terrible, not that he was aware of...he had no intention to find out, honestly-some things are best kept to oneself to avoid humiliation of all sorts.

He put down his chopsticks.

"I'm not finished yet" Chizuru stuttered quietly.

Hijikata turned paitiently,"It's okay, take the time".

She continued eating in the pleasant silence between them, replaced by singing birds.

...

"I'm done" she placed her items down on her lap.

"Alright.." he stood up, she followed. They handed their dishes in, which was far easier than taking them-most people had already sat down by now.

"So, where to?" he turned to face her, his hands on his hips.

"Uh-m...how about, over there?" she pointed behind him.

"Okay" he reached for her hand as he started walking infront of her-it never seemed to fail on his part-whether he meant to blush her face or not.

"I didn't expect-"

"Whatever, he smiled, I just don't want you to get lost" he grinned that grin of his.

She couldn't really help but to grin back.

They had spent several hours casually visiting booths and checking things out-there was no rush, as far as either was concerned. They both seemed to enjoy exploring and taking it all in.

The early evening that was supper hours had past, as dark started to take over. It was warm night-the people and lanterns gave the evening a comforting glow. Many could lose sight of the hours spent, as even though daytime was most active, these late evenings were welcoming and often gave people a second wind-Evening was it's own time and place...and every time and place needs time for energy, and people to inhabit it.

As dark did begin to cover, many lights had turned on to eliminate the streets and field. There were even lights on the hills, and the roads that went uphill. There were great views on those slopes, some with fencing so you could stand at the near-edge and enjoy it safely. Many trees also inhabited this area, as it was a road meant to leave town-but there were always plenty of trees around, anyway...and colorful sakura brightened the dark scene.

"Fireworks are starting soon! Fire works, come by and watch!" was a man dressed up for hot weather, his hakama tied up and his sleeves rolled back. _He must have been running around most of the day' _Most people assumed.

"Oh, did you hear that?" Chizuru turned to her taller half, his ever-content eyes paying her attention.

"Yes" he replied calmly, "and don't worry, I have a good spot in mind" he tilted his head slightly.

She smiled back.

"Fireworks are starting up, please come by and join us! Remember do not sit too closely-there are better views afar" was the announcer again.

He nearly started Chizuru from his sudden shout.

"What he really means is, do not sit too closely, or you will burn light into your eyes, or get burnt" Hijikata smarted, looking into the empty sky.

"Now now, I'm sure some people arent that.."

"Haha...you'd be surprised" he looked back, "I Guess we should go find our spot now-before the other's take it" He said as he began to walk, Chizuru followed suite.

Making their way up, they were joined by less people than usual on the viewing road-hill. It curved to the right as the hill progressed on a low slant. There was a few large trees right to their left as they found their spot. Not many had stood right by them, but the people that did were respectable of each other. Most of the other's had been on the lower ground, or on the hill further past the one they turned on-too far away to be of any nuisance to anyone. Some even tried to use the roofs-many didn't find it so easy to scale and gave up. The shop owners however had the luck of using escape routes, and had their own private viewing pad.

Everyone was ready-chatting amonst each other, and themselves-but they waited just long enough to be completely started by the first burst of crackling light. Chizuru stared in astonishment-they were quite wonderful.

As the fireworks began to pick up, they whistled and cracked in harmony, some much larger and brighter, they all complimented each other. Some had been in colors of the sakura trees; pinks and whites in large groups-and like falling petals as they fell.

Others were bright reds and blues, and greens, and so forth-intensifying as they flew up.

Chizuru, agape in her still astonishment, her eyes sparkled-and took on the colors of the ever-changing lights in their reflections. Hijikata turned his satisfied gaze from the wonderful light display, focusing on her well-lit eyes. Very much involved, she took no notice of his eyes watching hers, feeling far more ambitiously satisfied. He played a smile on his face, a look of finished business. He was somehow feeling incredibly happy for this turn of events-how much he'd changed. There seemed to very little that could make him feel a thump of joy in his chest-like he had accomplished something, and wanted to continue to please more—this was not the last "date", for sure...and hopefully next time there was something even prettier than artificial light works.

The ocean came into his mind...w_ait, What? Man...I'm getting way too romantic!...I have to take this a step slower—fireworks are good...fireworks are good. Maybe the ocean...later-oh, she's going to notice if I stare in thought like this-I seem too focused on her now, with a deadpan look"_

Much to his pleasure, she did not notice. Perhaps she felt his stare through her, but he'd just wait it out-maybe she didn't.

She didn't...but decided to re-add Hijikata back, and turned to face him. "They're so pretty " she stated joyously.  
"Yes, they are" he sweat a moment, but showed not a sign of it.

She had eyes tonight that sparkled like jewels. They seemed to gaze at him-first excited. He smiled softly, his meeting her eyes.

Chizuru's joy stayed on her face, but her eyes began to fall under his spell-he locked his intent gaze, as his own eyes stared into her soul.

He didn't quite mean to stare so deep...but he felt like her's had opened up like windows, and he was allowed to see her smile so genuinely-his eyes were allowed to see her's fill up, and best of all, it was from him. He took great joy in it.

They seemed to fill each other's empty spaces, he knew;She only wanted to feel safe, and he wanted something to feel sane with-even if it made him far less sane in other ways.

He'd quite likely kill someone over her, any moment. That didn't seem like a good idea when it wasn't considered a threat, though.

Their gazes held strong.

Quietly, Hijikata raised a hand towards her left cheek. Chizuru similarly put her delicate hand on his face, gently touching his cheek.

They both had forgotten any sounds outside their space. Chizuru smiled sympathetically, her sparkling eyes glistened. She seemed to be working up a tear, a particular shiny spot in the corner. Whatever exact origin of her emotion led her to touch his face brought out a small tear welling up-but she couldn't say anything.  
Hijikata reacted with a twice-sympathic face, his eyebrows curved in worry, but he had nothing he could think to as her. He wiped the what seemed, happy-tear out of her eye, but decided to leave the rest-there was something beautiful about the tears she cried-like her heart spoke. _Is this, what it's like to watch someone cry their heart at you...in a different way-I don't believe Ive mad her sad, have I?"_

As he considered, she saw his worried eyes grow moreso that she thought he was going to set in a wrinkle.

"Don't trouble, Hijikata-san...Toshizo-san...I do not cry in sadness-but only at the idea of leaving me...but this is not that kind of tear." She paused, her voice lost in her filling emotion.

He let her...

-"I honestly love you, Hi-..Toshizo.." she paused again- her eyes in-translating her emotions. _Toshizo_' That made his spine tingle. He couldn't have gotten used to it yet-he already felt possessed by that voice-but when it said his unspoken name, it seemed to grab hold of him, as if her voice had that power-to take control of one's being by speaking them out.

His gaze from soft went shocked-lost in bewilderment, or paralyzed-he didn't know which. The more her gaze covered his, the more he realized how he reacted, and than reacted to it.

"Chizuru..." he whispered...

As his deep understanding yet deepened further, he felt all sorts of butterflies and tingles. His eyes intensified, finding their own source inside. He blinked a moment...his hand on her face caressed as he secondly decided how to hold her...their eyes deepened as he let his open up to her, his cheeks no longer controlled, changed color to match hers. He caressed her face a second longer to find the answer, as her hand crept on his cheekbone-Drawn to each other's face, he decided, he closed in the space just a bit between them an inch by foot, and leaned in-closing his lips toward her's.

He had not anything else to decide-he wanted to kiss her. Chizuru finished the space between, intercepting him gently-her eyes light-glittered and hazed in emotion.

As their lips met, Hijikata felt her small rush creep into him, he placed his other hand firmly on her back. His movement had closed in what space was left between, their hearts close enough to hear one another.

Chizuru placed her free hand on his chest. Their kiss deepened, she readjusted her hand from his chest, and stretched out to his back, holding him closer to her.

Had the fireworks still been going, perhaps people would have taken notice-but neither of them had seemed to observe that everyone had already left the view spot. People were still below, gathering and finishing the night's event-most booths were closing...but the two could care less. This was far better-and it lasted as long as they wanted it to-as long as they lived, it would last.

They had enjoyed the events-but they loved each other far more.

Hijikata's grip on her face tightened as let his feelings flood through their lips. He wanted to kiss her neck. He let that slide, for the moment...but it slowly itched at him.

As he hand held his face tighter, it wasn't sure if it wanted to reach to his back as well, or , she let her light fragile hand slide down his neck and between neck and his shoulder, giving him chills.

She felt his nerves react, a split second of amusement played her kiss-but that made his want to kiss her more. They breathed a second enough, calming their lips-Hijikata gently pressed his against hers, taking in every gentle breathe and texture-

As their grips on each other's backs loosened, they found themselves lost, or found, but time was non- existent. Silence over came them. It felt like that a long time...his hand barely gripping her face.

Than Hijikata felt the needing desire to move on-

His mouth slowly left hers, and exceedingly slowly hovered down her cheekbone, and neck. He breathed there a few. She paused, her eyes still closed, feeling his warmth.

He proceeded to caress her neck with his lips. Afraid of how delicate she was, he did so, cautiously.

Admittedly, this was not the first time he kissed her neck, but he wanted to make it innocent-he didn't want her to want something neither should want at this moment-despite how sensual it might be to kiss one's neck, especially for him. Perhaps he wasn't so innocent...sometimes he felt like it was fun to he could pretend-because he wanted to be for her-she deserved better than what other men would give. He reduced him into nothingness, that power over him was intoxicating, and at times made him laugh. _Still that doesn't mean I can't play just a little bit, though...I know she finds amusement in it...but only a little.._

"_No matter how much I want to admit it's considered bad of me, I think I like it when he kisses my neck—there's just something about it-and only he has the ability to make me like it so much...his charm-I love his personality so much that it makes him twice as intriguing-I feel like I get strange feelings in my stomach as well...Toshizo.."_

"_...Chizuru...-chan"_ his soft voice

_(Perhaps because he is so ambitious, cunning, decisive, and relentless in battle-he's a leader, is strong in mind and action as he is in words-many follow him, and he inspires them to, -his subtle yet charmingly expressive gestures-and he's incredibly mature and handsome-...and yet, somehow I fall into his hands, and he loves me...that those lips that carry powerful words to bring others into battle, and those eyes that can carry his will and can pierce a soul-and that hair that flows across his face-that they could be so incredibly gentle...that they'd be mine, and they'd be touching my lips-and looking at me like I was a totally different world, that I'd mean so much to him that he could throw away his mask and remember he's human-that he breaks down, and he's willing to let me see it-Perhaps that's what I love about him...and just thinking about makes my chills appear, and my heart skips-he amazes me..I am proud to be his-indeed, I would follow him to the depths of hell if I had to-he inspires me beyond my own comprehension-but it is his heart, not his war cry)_


	15. Chapter 15

Okita crossed his arms "Okay...I know we let them be alone for awhile...but it's kind of weird when Hijikata is gone so long-you think-?" his voice hinted

"N-Nuo! What were you thinking?" Heisuke barked in embarrassment at his comrade's idea.

"I was just being-" he started, cut off by Shinpachi, "-Well in any case, I'm sure it's obvious they are together"

"Y-yeah..."Heisuke mumbled.

"What, are you displeased?" Shinpachi tilted his head, amused.  
"No...okay we all know Chizuru is cute—but that's besides the point!...Okita was just giving me weird images"

"Oh...Okita, don't give Heisuke weird images"  
"Pft...Fiiine.."Okita droned.

"Although,"Sanosuke smiled knowingly, "I'm pretty sure he's kissed her by now"

"That is an odd sight, you know, just considering how we see him everyday...but, it's also very not hard to picture—I just don't know what I'd do if I caught him kissing her is all" Sannan shrugged, his arms out, his face slightly grinned.

"Yeah, he's generally just not the type...but lately, he's..-"

"Been very different" Saito rubbed his chin thoughtfully, "But that's not all bad-he gets along with all of us better...and, he's no less ferocious in battle-no one can replace our 'demon-vice commander'" Saito seemed pleased over the nickname, it reassured him Hijikata would never change in spirit.

"Yeah, you are right" Heisuke agreed, much more relieved.

"I am...and, I also think, Hijikata-san loves her very much" Saito felt himself stumble over that sentence-it was quite odd—who talked about love in a samurai's headquarters?

No one here had time to fall in love, or to leave love behind with death—

It was just best for everyone to avoid such things as 'love'...but, most times, a commander didn't have such loyal subjects, and a girl living in their headquarters-most times, a man would have to be absent and easily distracting from duty—but anyone with Chizuru was lucky. They whom, didn't have to go out of their way to see her-she was there all the time, so it wasn't a big deal if she was around, because everyone recognized her as another part of their daily lives-

-But there was always the times they felt their vice-commander was especially noticing, and that he seemed eager to excuse himself when she was alone.

Most of the admitted to themselves or at times, another, that they admired Chizuru—Even Saito, though well-hidden even from himself as he had it, carried a fondness...but in their deep respect and desire to see their vice-commander at health, sometimes you had to sacrifice that-and, with so many of them—only one man would have her, anyway...

...So really, it was for the best-Hijikata had far more on his plate, and many times acted far too strong when he could've been more emotional-but with only his subordinates around, and a responsibility on his shoulders, he couldn't afford it. Not around them-and especially not around their recruits-he was the powerful demon vice-commander, as it were...he was a leader, he was a lion—a lion cannot show weakness.

But there were times they did forget, that true courage came from fear-because being calculating and emotionally-isolated in battle was safer, but at those times, you sometimes forget what it was you were fighting for.

They didn't want Hijikata to lose that...and they didn't want him to lose sight of it, if they were to die before him. Intentionally, they would choose to die for his him-but in hopes he'd live without vengeance and know solace—but one cannot feel some of these things alone, when everyone has fallen before them—and fallen FOR them-to lead their future path...and than, only to forget what it was...the worst case would probably be they and He both die in vain fighting because he forgot what that reason was, after all.

* * *

The moon shone through the dark sky. Stars appeared as the sun had faded for sleep. Her silver and purple clothe reflected the moon's light, her skin softened with the light's glow. Chizuru brushed her fingers across the strong collarbone of the bewitched man. He was neither broad nor slim-that bizarre range of perfect in between. His violet eyes needed no light facing them to noticably cast for her, admiring the play of soft lights on her face.

His kimono layering was slightly loose, like many men's-they seemed to have some manly dignity from it—but Chizuru took the opportunity to admire his strong chest. She felt like she had come close to a distanced being-no one should opening touch what kimono's didn't completely cover—it was respectful and proper-but she felt that special expection bond, the one that let her walk closer to an injured creature without being bitten. She gently observed with her nerves the subtle curves and muscles that made him so strong, but not so obvious.

It must be what many woman experience when falling in love with a samurai, she figured...but it made hers no less magical.

Hijikata held her other hand loosely in the air between them, his eyes focused on hers.

He seemed to want to know what she was thinking, but decided he didn't need to. His temperment so calm, she lulled him nearly. Observing her facial expressions as she touched him took up all of relaxed eye's interest.

She ran her fingers gently from his collar to his lower neck, and back. Than by some sort of observant confirmation, decided it was where her head wanted to rest. He leaned in a bit, to allow her ease. She seemed so content. Silence had been between them for awhile-but neither wanted to break it.

He felt her breathe ease, a gentle air across his chest. Keeping hold of her hand, he used his other on her head.

As much as he knew she wanted to stay like this, he caught feeling of her body tiring, it was taking more effort to stand up.

"Chizuru" he questioned in his tone. She answered by straightening up. It wasn't good enough for him-you didn't fool Hijikata like that. "Chizuru-You are tired..."

"I'm fine..."

"Allow me-" he picked her up and lay her beside the tree, "-eh!..Hi-Hijikata!.." she shocked.

"Don't try to fool me, little one" he smiled, "You are weakening, you need rest". She wanted to protest, but had little to when he had sat down beside her, and took her head in his lap

.

"Hi...Toshiro..?" she mused quietly. With far little to complain about, she crawled into his lap enough to comfort herself. Her small shoulders loosened, and her slender form laying innocently in it's cute shape made him want to hold her. His arms itched to feel her warm form, his heart fluttered, worried. He hesitated just a bit, and gave in.

She felt safe. He was worried how much he suddenly felt need of her-how crazy it would drive him. He was afraid-and now, he couldn't just let her go-there was no leaving him now, he felt...she had many chances to leave, but now, He really, really wouldn't let her. That made her happier than he wanted, feeling she was giving up everything now to be in his possession-but in the end, he couldn't help succumb to his growing desire for her presence.

As his thoughts drifted into those strange levels, he noticed her breathe leveled. She must have been quite tired, after all. "I guess I should take you back now" he whispered, "but not yet-just a bit longer".

Her eyes were loosely closed to suggest deep relaxation. Smiling subtly , he watched her sides rise and fall with her breathe.

And than he himself started to nod off a moment or two-his eyes sneaking closed several times. Hijikata blinked, remembering his whereabouts. _"I think it's time to go back" _.

Chuckling quietly with raised eyebrows, he looked down at his lap.

He began to search for an easy way to carry her off. He did not want to wake her up-this was something he was not quite skilled at-most cases, an conscienceless body was a dead body—but in this case, he had to make sure she didn't awake-in his respects to her. She probably would protest him needing to carry her, tell him she's fine by foot, that she'd just be a burden...but he wasn't going to let her do that—she was going to be carried by him, whether she liked it or not.

He sighed. _This is a lot harder than I thought..._

Gently prodding at her sides and ribs a bit, he found a fairly non-awkward way to lift her up-his one arm under her waist, the other prying their way between the ground and her leg. As inconspicuously as possible, he lifted her up, slowly-checking to make sure she was fast asleep.

Eyeing her for every move and step he took, Hijikata managed to stand up with her, not in any way aware of her dilemma-what was even really a dilemma at all.

In fact, she was just small enough, that it made her fairly easy to carry. He adored her the more he noticed.

Smirking with hard-earned accomplishment, Hijikata fully rose and got a better grip as he held her, and started to walk down the hill.

It was past midnight at the time Hijikata arrived through the headquarters entrance.

He had hoped everyone had gone to sleep, but it wasn't the case.

Okita seemed to be waiting up, or just unable to sleep. He leaned against the building, his head low, one leg resting back with a foot against the wall. He took notice of the long-absent pair. Saito seemed to be around as well.

"That sure took you" Okita smirked placidly-not moving his head.

"I'm just going to take her to her room—if you men need me, I'll be right back-"  
"Would be nice to share some company in his nice evening, but you also seem rather tired, yourself" Okita commented, turning to observe the Chizuru laying asleep in Hijijata's arms.

"...Yeah" his eyes felt heavier. "I'll be back, anyway-for a short bit" Hijkata walked past, and disappeared.

"He sure is fond of her" Okita turned to Saito, whom was standing across the yard, hidden by shadow.

"Yes-it fills me to see him so-but sometimes, I worry-..."

"Yeah..."

"We just have to believe he won't eve falter, that it will only make him stronger" Saito's words filled both their hearts with renewable faith.

"...I'm more worried about what he's gonna do when she _isn't_ around" Saito worried.

"We basically concluded you won't need Rasetsu anymore if Chizuru is in danger" Okita smirked-but a moer serious tone was behind it.

"Or rather...you might try to overuse rasetsu because of it..." Saito grimly added.

"...Guys..." he felt dumbfounded...than, a mopped look of guilt overtook him. "I, for the sake of, what is worth fighting for...hope, I never have to use rasetsu whenever not necessary-and if I do, please stop me,...unless I strictly order you not to" He blinked in thought.

Silence fell over them like the dark.

Just as Hijikata was about to leave, Okita interupted him."Do not promise to die for her, or to die in her sake-"  
"Oki-"

"No...", stuttered Okita, "If you want to protect her, live for her."

...

"If you truly care about her, if you understand your position in this group-you will live, no matter what happens to us. You know we are bound to protect our two leaders-we all need you. Chizuru needs you. If you die, what do you think will happen to the Shinsengumi? To Chizuru?" Okita stammered.

"Promise you will take Chizuru somewhere safe, and if Tokugawa must falter, you will stay with her-"  
"Bu-"  
"No!" Okita yelled. We all feel the same, Hijikata-san. I'm sorry, but most of us feel like,...like, we have cheated death, several times. This rasetsu is great, but, we won't die to watch our dreams fall, and if none of us ever accomplish our main goals, the least we will accomplish is to make sure, that you aren't dead with the rest of the dreams-as long as you live, you carry all of us-and if you die in vain, who will carry us on? I ask not of veangance, but for peace of mind-let us all rest in peace at the end, and our souls know we at least protected something-including the bond you share with Chizuru.

"..."

"None of us want to see her hurt. We think she is very good for you...but, if you even _think_ of dieing, all you will do is cause her pain—and she will be all alone...and, I wonder,.. how painful that is"

Hijikata had nothing to say.

"There is a difference, between dieing for one's belief, and having something left to live for" Saito helped explain

"Even if the age of the sword is coming to it's end, you still have someone's heart left in your care-someone who cannot be broken. Even if, she came to terms with you dieing peacefully the way you'd want to be seen on the battlefield..I can only imagine, what agony she will feel inspite of herself—no amount of sympathetic, happy tears of hers she may cry for your death will hide her mourning-and I believe, she will have a hard time finding a new path to live now-it's too late to force her to go, she is our responsibility as much she is her own, because we took it on ourselves to protect her"

"And so, no matter what you say, dear leader of ours, we demand you stop your helpess attempts to redeem yourself for the name of others, and learn to live the other path of the warrior-one who preserves and adapts to fight later" Saito hardened a stern look into Hijikata's eyes, a commanding aura enveloped the subordinate, a man often unseen in his silent debates.

The stare held still-waiting for the right answer.

Hijikata stared back, agape by the demand upon him "...I understand." he lowered.

"Good..."

"You all are such great allies, I could ask for no other" he smiled, "Forgive me, if I caused you to lose faith-and that I did not consider this new way of living-it will be hard, I tell you...but for everyone's sake, for Chizuru-I will not waste my life meaninglessly."

"Do not waste it at all" Yamazaki reminded, standing in the shadows aside Saito."We all have many years yet ahead of us to die a honorable death-this is, by no means, the last chance. It may be the end of the sword, but there will be others like us, we will_ not_ die out so easily" he smiled with vigour.

"Even if I must keep the Shinsengumi name in secret, so be it" Hijikata smirked in taste of his bitter-sweet defeat.

"My people were raised to adapt to changing, so I believe they will be around for many years, even if our numbers dwindle-there is always someplace to hide, and always someone to hire us" Yamazaki smirked back, "In some form or another, the way of the warrior will survive"

"As long as it's within ourselves, there is no death to the warrior's way-it is way of life" Saito smiled.

As the air lifted from anguish to morale, The four men decided it was best to keep at that for last thought-and time to go to bed.

"I'm pressed to admit I am quite tired" Hijikata spoke up.

"Charming ladies isn't always easy, eh?" Okita sneered teasingly.

"Now, I didn't say that-merely, I had a rather big day-and all those crowds aboutm aren't the same thing as commanding troupes."  
"And neither is it the same to come to terms with your heart" Saito finished it. A small smile played on his defeated face.

"...I...yeah"

"No need to explain, it's on your face. We should just get to sleep now, before I start yawning" Okita yawned.

"Indeed" Saito agreed, waiting for the others-and started towards his quarters.

Hijikata gave them a thankful look, and walked off quietly.

Okita yawned his way down. Yamazaki returned to his night watch,disappearing into the dark.

To reassure himself about the conversation,no...the lecture he just underwent, he slowly opened her door a crack. Peering inside, he saw her sleeping sound-remembering, reminding him, just why he went through such an agreement-to lay his way of life down and calm his sword, he reminded himself why it was so important, and he remembered well.

"_Chizuru-what I've done to protect you-I just hope, we never have to be in a situation where I must draw my sword in desperation-that no one will challenge your life or mine-and that I defeat them swiftly without any reason to worry you..-but, I do wish to finish leading my army-that I cannot abandon"_

His gaze fell of sorrow and pain, yet fulfillment and happiness-so many things she brought with her. He closed her door silently, and went to his room. He fell asleep moments after without a sound.


	16. Chapter 16

I have updated 2 different Hakuouki fanfics within the last 3 hours xp...This one, and a new one.

Another user and I are having amusing ideas related to how ours at first seemed alike-and, maybe having a funny one-shot about Kazama being stalked by Sen-hime, as his punishment for stalking.

Anyways, enjoy!

and why are there so many lines showing up...o.o...ah..!..Anyway, have fun reading XD

As Hijikata woke up, he realized the sun had already completely risen. Cursing himself, he got up, and changed.

With smell of food, Hijikata knew everyone had been recently eating. Entering, everyone welcomed him with a smile, a grin, or a generic stoic face depending who they were. Chizuru brightened up a bit, but her face seemed red of embarrassment.  
"They waste no time in teasing, don't they?" he growled to himself towards the kitchen.

"We left some for you" Saito stood, turning around calmly, handed Hijikata his share.

"Thanks.." he smiled generously..,"Good Morning, Saito", he added after.

Sitting down in the main eating room, most of the guys who had grins or smirks decided it was time to get up.

Best for them, that was. Hijikata was not pleased to be eating around such faces first thing in the morning-he knew where it was going.

He sat eating in silence.

Sannan greeted him, and left after a brief small talk.

...

"Good Morning, Hijikata" Chizuru chimed.

"...I see you got up early" He spoke softy.

"I admit, I fell asleep outside" she blushed, "I'm sorry..."  
"No...no, it's okay" he smiled, blinking in benevolence. He stared at her contently for a few moments.

"Uh-ahem, where's my manners?" He looked about, "So...Di-"

"Don't worry, they didnt bug me"

"Like hell they didn't" He turned away.

"They seem to like teasing you more,...and besides, they tend to feel bad after they've already made me blush" she admitted.

He smiled a humourous yet bitter grin"Yes, they do, don't they?"

Chizuru laughed nervously, "It's not always that bad...though...it means, you guys get along much better underneath that. If they feel connected by trust, they probably wouldn't tease their vice-commander like that" she smiled at him, hoping it would relieve his resentment.

"...Yeah, I guess you are right..."he sighed..."and, after all, you are quite hard to get by, you know. I'm sure I've said it many times"

"Something is rather nostalgic about you saying it many times, though" she smiled, "it means you are still the same person I know"

Hijikata frowned.

"You don't think I'd lose myself with the war, or rasetsu, do you?"

"N-no..."

"In all... honesty..."

"...If you had reason to let yourself fall, you would...but-"

"Hmm?"

"-But, uh..well...You have lots left to not fall over for-and I hope, you never need to sell your soul for anything-just be who you are, Toshiro"

Something about the last particle of her sentence ringed a bell-nostalgia...of his elder sister.  
_"Just be yourself, Toshiro-kun"_

"_But I want to be better! I could make mom and dad proud...I could-"  
"No...don't sell yourself to the warlords, and don't become a slave to your own mind-just live, as life was meant to be"  
"But mom and dad..."  
"They may have gone for a reason...for it makes us strong...and look at you! A strong, young man-with fire in your eyes, and a good heart...but there are some things I wish you didn't have to do" his sister frowned. "Please, promise me...if you do take up arms, don't forget why you did it. Don't forget any of us-don't sell your soul, you would not waste it, would you? Don't throw away what mother and father gave you" she smiled her pleasant smile._

"_...I-I understand...sis...I just want to be strong—and samurai-I look up to them"_

"_Do what you feel you must, but just don't forget"  
"I promise"_

"Hijikata?"

He was still brood in thought, staring at the wall behind Chizuru.

"Hijikata...kun?...Toshiro?"

Just as he could have lingered on deeper, the newer nostalgic familiar voice snapped him out of it.

"Chizuru.." he paused...looking around briefly.

"I'm sorry, I zoned out for a minute...forgive me". His frown lifted.

"It's okay...I was just worried"

He smiled reassuringly "Don't worry, it was nothing bad..."

"Can you tell me? Or is -"  
"I will tell you...I was just remmebering my older sister, is all..."  
"Oh..."  
"Did I ever tell you, about how I grew up?"  
"Not quite" she blinked awkwardly.

"I was a farm boy, sort of. My parents grew ill when I was still a child, and my sister took care of me. She was like a mother, really...it must be true, that even years after the need of your mother, you still linger on their existance they leave with you"

"Hijikata...Toshi-ro,...no one is no longer in need of their mother. She is always there, and she taught you many things before she left—we are all indebt to our mothers-and I'm sure, she is watching over you, too..." Chizuru frowned, and stopped...

"Just like, mine is, too" she looked at the floor.

"...I'm sorry" Hijikata frowned, looking down.

Awkward silence crept over them.

"So...what was she like?"

"Hmmm?...my mother? or..." he questioned

"Yes...and, your sister" she smiled.

"My mother , from what I remember, was very gentle. She was frail and couldn't do the farm work. Sister often helped her, and I tended to helping my father with the harder work. My sister was also much like her-but far more stubborn and stern." his face glowed of fond memories, a small chuckle.

"She was very bossy at times, my sister was. But she had no choice, really...father was stubborn about his work, and when he was falling sick, she forced him to stay in bed. Basically, my sister was running the house, ever since they grew sick...and, she had me to take care of. I admired her, but many times, I felt frustrated, too.."

Chizuru appeared to be intensely taking in his story, as if she was imagining it all in her head.

"We sold pharmacy drugs. My family was well-known for this trade, and my father was a great physician. I helped sell the medicine around town. However, after they died...I just couldn't bring myself to do it anymore. I wanted to let them live on in their work, but...when things didn't sell, and I grew tired, all I could think of was my sick and deceased parents. I decided, I needed to make a new path for myself."  
"Samurai?"

Hijikata nodded slightly."I was already teaching myself the way of the sword, albeit alone, and without any real practice. I met up with Kondou eventually, and we formed this group as the policing force...but with ambitions in mind, too"

"You had it rough, Hijikata-san-...Toshiro...we both did" she sat thoughfully.

"Yes...from what I understand, your family seems to think you need to keep your lineage. But as long as I'm around, no one is going to touch you" he sterned.

"That does help me feel better about it" she remarked.

Before either could say much else, He moved towards her, and pulled her into his arms.

"...Don't think for a minute, I would give you up" he whispered.

Still sitting, he pulled her into his lap.

"Toshi-"

"I love you, Chizuru..."  
"...Hijikata"  
"and the more I remember the empty holes I felt before I became a man, the more I remember I'm human...and I'm vulnerable...just as you are...but I promise, I'll not let you suffer again-and doing so, I'll fill my own too" he hugged her. His eyes closed tense.

Chizuru relaxed, and closed her eyes, smiling.  
"Promise me, too, that you will not stray-and I promise I'll always be by your side, even if you do"

"I promise..."

Loosening his grip, Hijikata looked at her momentarily...and than their eyes met, as Chizuru reached up, and slowly, they kissed...his hand reaching for her face. His strong profile silhouette touching her gently as his hand reached across her cheek, and her delicate figure leaning on him.

While you are waiting for the update, read my newest Chizuru x Hijikata fanfic!

.net/s/6726270/1/Endless_Reservoira_Rebirth_romance_story

Also, don't forget I have a fanfic dedicated to Yamazaki...I see not many have taken interest in it, but I'd like to take this to share it:

.net/s/6637765/1/Yamazaki_chronicleThe_way_of_Shadow

and, I haven't forgotten "Alone".

I am still going to update that.

Anyways, keep the reading and reviews going! xp...I am very happy to hear from you guys, it makes me excited to sign back in and read them :)...the more comments, the more I update, really, because I originally intented not to make this ongoing, but I am rather enjoying it so far, and I know I continued for you as well :)...

Anyways, Have a look at those, if you wish.

Btw, Saito kind of quietly left at some point there—he respects them too much to really linger and listen.


End file.
